Sonny With a Chance of Cutting
by slowandsimple
Summary: Sonny Monroe is hidding a drak secret from everyone, even her mom and boyfriend Chad Dylan Cooper. Sonny cuts herself. Problems from the past will be told and new problems will arise. Will Channy last? R&R Rated T for mentions of cutting!
1. Cries in the Closet

**Hey everyone, So this is my first story I have ever written So I really hope you like it. Enjoy!**

**Discaimer - I do not own Sonny with a Chance :'(  
>I wish I did ... But I dont D:<strong>

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><p>I was sitting in my dressing room taking a break from shooting my show (Yes even CDC needs breaks sometimes) Anyways I decided I was gunna text Sonny and see if she wanted to go out for dinner tonight. It had been a while sense we've been on a date, and even longer sense we've had some alone time. Considering our last date had been a double date with Blondi and her boy friend who's no where as cool as me. I think his name was Josh Beaver or somethin' like that. Turns out it didn't work out. Blondi just kept complaining about him and I quote "being too short" and "not being able to wear heals with him" for the whole 3 hours of the date!<p>

But whatever. I think its time Sonny and CDC spend some time alone.

I took out my phone began to text my exploding ball of sunshine.

_Hey Sonshine, feel like havin dinner tonight?_

_Not tonight Chad. Sorry I'm not feeling to good, maybe tomorrow?_

_Sure sounds good. Feel better 3 _

_Thanks love you Chad_

_Love u 2 Sunshine xoxo_

Well there goes that idea. I don't have anything to do now tonight.

A few hours later I was walking threw the halls of stage 2 (I was bored okay!) When I heard someone crying from behind a door that said _Janitor's Closet _written on the fading blue plastic.

Now normally I would stop listen to the sound for a few seconds the do a CDC hair flip, fix my collar, and smile to no one in particular then walk away. But ever sense Sonny and I have started to go out I have been a much better person. I don't know what made me open that door, whether it was curiosity, my telepathic powers or because I was simply wondering what a _Janitors Closet _was, I decided to opened the was I glad I did.

At first I couldn't see anything as the door noisily squeaked open. Then the light of the hallway caught the room. The room was full to the top with all different types of cleaning products and supplies. All three walls were lined with shelves. I noticed a small figured wearing a brown (fake) leather coat and blue dress sitting on the floor crying, their face covered by the mop bucket. "Hey you okay?" I asked the person. (Sometimes CDC does care about someone other than himself.)

When the person heard my voice they jumped and looked up at me panic written all over their face.

As soon as I saw the person I immediately began to worry, I moved into the closet and shut the door behind me, turned on the light and pushed everything out of my way. I brushed the girls hair out of their face to be sure it was her and gasped when I saw her full face."Sonny?" I asked. "What's wrong?"

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><p><strong>Well theres chapter 1! Next Chapter is up and thats when Sonny reveals her secret ... Kinda.<strong>

Please review and let me know what you think

xoxo Monica 3


	2. Dark secrets

**Here Is Chapter 2. Enjoy ****J**

**Chad's POV**

"Sonny?" I asked, worry lacing my voice "what's wrong" I got down on the floor beside her and pulled her into a hug. (CDC only sits on the floor for his girl)

"Chad?" she whispered her voice breaking on my name.

"Yeah its me Sonshine. What's wrong?" I asked again. Chad Dylan Cooper ALWAYS gets his answers.

"Sorry nothings wrong, I'm just not feeling good." Chad Dylan Cooper always get his answers … unless its from Sonny.

I knew she was lying, her voice always goes up when she's in denial. But I decided not to push her.

I pulled her onto my lap and just let her cry on my shoulder for a few minutes while I whispered sweet nothings into her ear.

After she had calmed down I helped her up off the floor.

"Thanks for that Chad, I really don't know what came over me there." She said, her voice rising a little. (Denial much)

"No problem Sonny. Is everything okay? You've been acting a lot less, well sunny lately." It was true Sonny had been acting strange for a little over a month now. It wasn't until now that I decided to voice my fears because she had never been this bad before. Normally she just hasn't been smiling that much and seems a lot more tired than normal.

"Yeah I'm good. I think I have just been a little stressed with my mom leaving to go back to Wisconsin. I really miss her." Sonny said her eyes growing sad at the thought of her mother gone.

I felt bad for Sonny her Great grandmother had died so Sonny had convinced her mom into going back to Wisconsin to help out with all the funeral arrangements and support the family. She was only supposed to be gone for 2 weeks but Connie had called and said her trip could last up to 4 months!

I took Sonny in my arms and kissed her cheek. I smiled when I saw a blush creep onto her face and watched her try to hide it in the crook of my neck.

"Hey Sonny if you ever just want to spend time together feel free to come over anytime. I live alone and I love having your company so its no problem. I would love to spend a night alone with you. " I added a wink at the end in a joking way.

"Dream on Pooper" She said

"Fine, I will then" I yelled getting our regular argument started

"Fine" she fired back, her hand on her hips and her eyes dead serious.

"Good" I yelled Imitating a girl in a high pitched whinny voice while putting my hands on my hips and making a pouty face. The look of this must have been very comical. Sonny and I loved to joke around like this and even though I hated making a fool of myself, it was worth it to hear Sonny's laugh.

"Good" she tried to yell back seriously, but failing miserably when she started laughing.

I chuckled to and pulled her in for a sweet kiss. "I love you Sonshine" I whispered resting my forehead on hers.

"I love you to Chad" she said looking at the ground all traces of happiness washed from her features

"Hey, what's wrong" I asked her again making her meet my eyes.

She starred into my eyes for a few seconds then sighed.

"Chad," she said my name sadly "I have something to tell you, and your not gunna like it. Your probably gunna hate me afterwards." She add the last part quietly.

"Sonny, I could never hate you. Not even when you throw me on the ground to win musical chairs" I smiled at the memory. Thoses little things she did just made me fall for her more and more back then. "You can tell me anything." It was true nothing she said could make me stop loving her. Not even if she was breaking up with me, I would still love her.

She took a deep breath, it was clear whatever she was trying to tell me was really bothering her. "I am c…" She was interrupted by the loud speaker above us. (Why there was a speaker in a janitor's closet I had no idea." "_Chad Dylan Cooper to the set please. Chad Dylan Cooper to the set"_

I sighed. "Tell me later." I said. "where?" she asked "I don't know where to meet you"

"I'll come by later" I said while pulling her out the closet with me. With that I kissed her cheek and started to walk away.

**Sonny's POV**

I watched as Chad walked away with tears dripping down my eyes. I had finally gathered up the courage to tell him and then he was taken away from me.

I walked down the hall towards stage 3, home of So Random! I walked into my shared dressing room and took a seat on Tawni's couch. I threw off the jacket that I had been wearing all day. (As I ways about to die from overheating) and looked down at my arms.

Red gashes and scars covered my wrists. I gently rubbed my fingers along the cuts I had made a few hours prior.

Yes I Sonny Monroe, cut myself. I can normally put on a smile but recently things have started to get really bad again.

You see when I was little and lived in Wisconsin, I had yet to grow into my body. Lots of girls made fun of me for my size and for the fact that I wanted to be an actress when I grew up. But one girl ruled all the others in order to make my life a living nightmare. Jessie Hamilton. I had to deal with her for 9 years. The only reason I got away was because I got my job on So Random! I thought that's when my life would turn around. But recently I got a new neighbour who just happens to be none other than Jessie Hamilton herself. Once again she's made it her life long mission to make my life hell.

All of this has been going on for about a month. I have been playing off my sad state as missing my mom and my great grams, which I do, but its more because of Jessie. I haven't told anyone any of this because I don't want people here to know about my past. But its causing me a lot of pain, and telling Chad would be the right thing to do. But I cant have him breaking up with me.

Just that thought made me start to cry. Lucky for me it was late and everyone else from So Random! Had gone home.

I honestly don't know what to do. I need to tell someone and I would love to have my boy friend help me threw this. But I cant loose him.

I guess I feel asleep because the next thing I know my name is being called frantically, and I'm being shaken awake.

When I open my eyes I see Chad standing over me stroking my hand.

My joy of seeing him quickly turns to terror when I realise that Chad isn't stroking my hand, he's rubbing the cuts on my wrist. The cuts that had been covered by the jacket I had ditched hours ago.

Tears and questions fill Chad's eye's, begging for answers. I don't see Chad cry often, the only other time I remember him crying was after he fell off the bike.

I don't linger on the though long. I stand up and bolt out the door before Chad can say anything.

I run as fast as I can threw the halls not bothering to look where Im going. I'm not that fast of a runner and my sleepy state and the fact I'm in heals doesn't help me in anyway or form.

I hear Chad calling my name and his feet pounding behind mine. I knew he was gaining on me.

I feel him grab my arm and try to stop me but I shake him off quickly and continue running pushing my legs harder ignoring the burn in my muscles and my difficulty breathing.

I can't let him catch me, if I do my life is over.

"He wasn't supposed to find out like this." I think. The thought alone bringing out a sob.

I manage to loose Chad in the winding halls after a few minutes of running.

I collapse in an unfamiliar hall and crawl into a random room. My head is spinning and my lungs hurt, both from lack of oxygen I assume. I lean against the wall in the fatal position and start to cry again.

"Why me?" I sob out loud. Talking to no one in particular.

I let my eyes close and fall back asleep as I think. "Jessie Hamilton, you have now taken everything from me."

**Well I hope you have liked my story so far!I have the next chapter if you guys like it. Please review!**

**Xoxo Monica 3**


	3. The Story Unfolds

**Hey guys, So I wasn't planning on posting a chapter today but when I got online and saw that each of my stories had 2 reviews and they hadn't even been up for 12 hours, I got super excited**

**I want to thank the 2 of you who reviewed.**

**Clkaudiia - _I dont speek Spanish but I do speek French so I did understand that, Thank you so much and here is another chapter for you :)_  
>CiaLovesChannyForeverLovatic - <em>Thank you so much it means alot. I did try to keep it along the lines of what really happened to demi but I also added my own ideas. This Chapter is for you too :)<em>**

**Disclaimer: I dont own SWAC :'(**

**Hope you enjoy it.**

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><p><strong>Chad's POV<strong>

I watched Sonny run threw the halls and quickly start to lose sight of her.

After searching for her for a while I gave up and slide down the side of the wall. I put my head in my hands and ran my fingers threw my hair in an attempt to calm myself down.

I can't believe Sonny is cutting herself! Was that what she was trying to tell me today in the closet? Is that why she was crying?

Hundreds of questions fill my head but I'm at loss for answers. I closed my eyes and pounded my head against the wall.

"I have to find Sonny" I said, forcing myself to stand up. Sadly I have no idea where she could be.

I returned to the last place I saw her and start to randomly walk threw the unfamiliar halls.

I was just about to give up when I noticed a door open among all of the closed ones. I peeked my head in the door and saw a figure curled up against the wall.

I felt relief flow threw me as I noticed it was Sonny.

I debated waking her up but I didn't want her to run away again. I pulled her into my arms and started to find my way to my dressing room.

Normally it takes less than 5 minutes to get from stage 3 to stage 2 but considering I had no idea where I was and no one in Condor Studios is smart enough to put up maps it took me over half an hour.

When I finally did get to my dressing room I gently put Sonny down on the couch.

My arms were sore from holding her for so long and I gladly started to stretch them out.

I sat down on the floor resting my head against Sonny's knee prepared to wait as long as needed for her to wake questions started to fill my head as I stared at the beautiful girl I had fallen in love with. Was it me who was making her cut? Did I do something wrong? How long has this been going on? Who else knew about her problem? Did she have any other problems she wouldn't voice?

I'm embarrassed to say it but I probably waited 5 minutes before my curiosity started to drive me crazy and I started to wake Sonny up.

"Sonny" I gently whispered while I shook her shoulder lightly "wake up Sonshine"

Sonny's eyes started to flutter open and panic filled her beautiful brown eyes. She started to get up but I managed to hold her down this time. I pulled her to my chest and gently smoothed her hair.

"Shhh its okay Sonny, calm down. I'm not mad and I don't hate you. Everything's okay" I told her in a rush. I remembered what she had said earlier in the closet. How she though I would be mad and hate her. I knew I had to calm her down if I wanted any answers from her.

Upon hearing my words Sonny started to relax in my arms.

"You okay?" I asked her.

Sonny stared at me for a moment judging my emotions I assume before she did anything.

Sonny collapsed into my arms tears falling out of her eyes. "Shhh its okay calm down." I told her "everything's okay now."

"Chad, I'm so sorry." she cried "I wanted to tell you so badly but I didn't know what you would say."

"Its fine Sonny, but why are you doing this to yourself?" I asked her wondering what could possibly make Sonny so upset.

Sonny sighed. "I will tell you Chad but you have to promise to let me finish before you say anything okay?" I didn't really want to agree to that, but I knew how stubborn Sonny was and if I wanted to know what was going on I was going to have to agree.

"I promise" I said

Sonny looked down at her hands before she started to speak. "Well when I was younger and in school I was a fat kid." I frowned at this already not liking where this was going. "I never really cared about my weight, it wasn't something that bothered me until this one girl, Jessie Hamilton, came to my school." Sonny's eyes shifted to the door before she continued. "Jessie, was a huge bully towards me. It started out as her just excluding me from games and stuff like that. Stuff that would just annoy me. But then lead to bigger things like pushing me down the stairs and getting my other friends to all get up and leave when I came near them."

Sonny stopped and I whipped a tear from her cheek. She had never mentioned that she had problems at school before.

"Anyways Jessie verbally and physically abused me for years. She made me feel so bad about myself and I couldn't handle all the emotions. At the age of 13 I started cutting." Another stray tear fell down Sonny's cheek but she whipped it away before I had a chance to. "I hated myself so much and I needed a way to show that hate for myself in someway. That's why I started cutting"

I took Sonny's hand in mine and squeezed it, encouraging her to keep going.

"But no matter what she did to me and no matter how badly I was hurting inside, I always kept a smile on my face. That's why I'm called Sonny." She rolled her eyes as she stated to obvious.

I personally did think the name Sonny suited her better than Alison. She has always been an exploding ball of sunshine.

"I thought that when I moved here everything would go away, that I could put my past behind me and move towards the future. And I did for a long time. Jessie was long forgotten and just a bad memory. I stopped cutting and everything was perfect. I made new friends, got a new house, got an amazing boyfriend" she smiled a real smile when she said that and so did I. I was happy to know I made her smile even in times like this.

"Everything was good until my mom left. A few days after my mom moved back to Wisconsin I got a new neighbour. It turns out that it was none other than Jessie Hamilton herself." I frowned at this, I didn't even know this girl and I hated her with a passion already.

"She's been making my life hell again for the last month. She tells me how ugly and untalented I am. She says I am using you and I don't deserve anything I have. She's locked me in the closet for 32 hours. I was so hungry and had no food or water. I finally managed to crawl out the window, she would of left me there for days. I'm terrified to go home because I don't want to see her. I don't know what to do Chad."

Sonny finally looked up at me letting me know that she was done.

I pulled her off the couch into my lap and wrapped her in a bone crushing hug. "I am so sorry Sonny." I gently rubbed her scratched up wrists. "Does anyone else know?" I asked her.

"No I've never told anyone." she said this as if it were the most obvious thing in the world

"Not even your mom?" Sonny shook her head.

I had always thought that Sonny was an open book, that she would tell her mom everything. She had always seemed so bad at keeping secrets. ( Yes even CDC is wrong sometimes its not that big of a deal!)

Sonny interrupted my thought then "Nope, I never told anyone anything ever, you're the first person to ever hear any of this." I kissed her cheek and then her lips.

"Were gunna get threw this, together. I love you and I'm gunna stand beside you and help you get past this and Jessie is going to leave you alone." I told her. Sonny's eyes locked with mine and I pulled her in for another kiss. " I love you Sonny" I whispered again. "I love you to Chad" She said. Sonny leaned down and rested her head on my shoulder. "Thank you." She had whispered it so quietly I barley heard it.

"anytime Sonshine."

Me and Sonny sat like that for hours until we fell asleep: her on my lap and my hand holding hers.

No matter what I was going to help her threw this. She was the most important person in my life and no one was going to get away with hurting Sonny. Not on my watch." 

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><p><strong>So Theres the chapter. The more reviews I get the more I update :D.<strong>

**Just so you know my break is ending tomorrow (sob) So I wont be able to write as much cuz I am in grade 9 and I have a hard semester (and Im in French Immersion)**

**But I write a new chapter before I post one so if you guys review chapters will come in faster. **


	4. Sonny's Grade 8 Yearbook

**Here Is Chapter 4 :)**

**A heads up I probably wont be posting till later on in the week as I have LOTS of homework I have to finish for Monday!**

**A huge thanks to my Beta Anastasia for editing this chapter for me 3**

**Disclaimer: I DONT OWN SWAC ... YET!**

**Hope you enjoy Chapter 4 :)**

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><p><strong>Chad's POV<strong>

Sonny woke up around 6:30 later that night so I decided to take her home so she could get some rest.

I was playing with Sonny's fingers and she was leaning against my back on the couch. "Hey Sonny, do you want to go home?" I asked her.

I have to admit I was a tad worried about what her reaction might be.

Sonny surprised me though. She stayed perfectly calm and replied with a simple "No"

"Why not?" I asked her curious on why she wouldn't want to go home.

Sonny shifted in my lap so she was facing me with one leg hanging lazily off the brown sofa. "I don't want to run into Jessie." She said. I mentally slapped myself, it was the most obvious thing in the world, but Sonny couldn't stay here all night. I tried a different approach. "You don't have to worry Sonshine. I'll drive you there and I wont let her hurt you." I told her. It was true I wouldn't let anyone hurt my Sonny, well not anymore.

Sonny sighed and got up "Fine" she said. I smiled

"Fine" I fired back trying to get her to smile.

It worked Sonny started to beam as we got our argument started

"Good" She said.

"Good" I finished as I grabbed her hand and pulled her out of the dressing room towards my car.

It was obvious Sonny was extremely nervous going back to her apartment. She was squirming the whole ride there and when her house came into sight her breathing sped up quite a bit.

I parked the car and went around to open Sonny's door for her. She climbed out the car and pulled me into a bone crushing hug. When she let go she took my hand and pulled me forward.

**Sonny's POV**

When Chad and I got to the door I hesitated and looked at Chad. He nodded encouragingly and squeezed my hand. I took a deep breath and opened the door.

The lobby was empty and I felt ready to cry in relief.

I pulled Chad to the elevator and pushed the second floor button when we got in.

The elevator went up and the doors open on my floor revealing a skinny blond green eyed goddess by the name of Jessie Hamilton. I shrunk into Chad and he pulled me close, obviously figuring out that this was the girl who made me cut and my life hell.

"Sonny!" Jessie said in her high pitched voice "Oh, and who do we have here. None other than Chad Dylan Cooper himself . Sonny you never told me you paid Chad to hang out." She said laughing at her own joke.

"She doesn't pay me, and I am her boyfriend" Chad defended me in a less then friendly voice.

Jessie's smile fell for a split second before it came back full watts. "Well I have to go, sorry we couldn't talk longer Sonny, Chad, but don't worry I left you a surprise in your apartment." She said in a very proud voice, running off before either of us could get a word in.

Chad and I stood in the hall for a minute before Chad had to literally drag me to my door.

He took my keys from my bag and unlocked the door to reveal my apartment. Everything was the same there was nothing out of place. I wondered what Jessie was talking about right as my eyes fell on a book on the coffee table.

It was a purple book and I noticed it to be the grade 8 year book that someone had stole from me. I opened to book to find everything fine until I got to the comments section.

Everyone of my old friends had signed the book (even if they didn't go to my grade 8 high school) and the pages were filled with the most hurtful words out there. Chad shut the book before I could read to much and pulled me in for a hug.

"Shh don't cry Sonny, none of that stuff is true." He whispered in my ear.

I hadn't even noticed I had been crying until he pointed it out. I rubbed the tears off my cheek and pulled myself closer to Chad. "Why me?" I questioned him. When he didn't give me an answer I stared to repeat "What did I ever do to her, why me?" over and over again.

Chad didn't say much, he just held me until I felt better.

"Feeling better?" He asked me, I nodded in response. He smiled and the looked down at my hands "No cutting right?" He asked me.

"Right" I said, though I don't know if I wont cut. But I would try not to for Chad.

Chad and I just sat on the couch for a few more minutes in a comfortable silence, then Chad got up. "Well I should probably go, it's getting late." He said. I felt myself start to panic and got up and grabbed Chad's shirt. "Don't go. Please stay with me tonight." I begged him "I don't want to have to deal with Jessie if she comes back."

Chad seemed to debate this for a minute before he agreed with a nod. I sighed in relief and pulled him in for a sweet kiss. "Thank you" I whispered against his lips. Chad kissed my one more time "anytime" he said.

Later that night Chad decided that he would sleep on the couch despite my protests that it was fine if he slept in my bed with me, but after a huge tickle fight and some hot coco, Chad ended up on the couch with a pillow and blanket.

"Night Chad" I said making my way to my bedroom

"Night Sonshine, sweet dreams." He said back.

I feel asleep very easily that night knowing Chad was a room away.

It was a few hours later that I was woken up by someone shaking me.

At first I thought it was Chad until I saw the long flowing blond hair and green eyes.

"Sweet dreams Sonny." Jessie whispered in my ear before running out of my room.

I was terrified. How had she gotten in my house? I thought before I realised Chad hadn't locked the door behind him when we had come in.

I started to get up to go wake Chad when I realised what Jessie had been doing this whole time. I had a gag over my mouth and my wrists and ankles were tied with rope and attached to my head bored and base bored. I couldn't move or cry out for help. Even with Chad here Jessie had managed to get me twice in one night.

I could feel the ropes reopening the cuts on my wrists as I struggled to get free to no avail. I stopped moving and just went limp.

When would everything go back to how it was before she came? I silently wondered. Tears stung my eyes but there was nothing I could do but wait for Chad to come find me. Thank god he had stayed the night.

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><p><strong>Well That was chapter 4.<strong>

**Dont you just already hate Jessie? I know I do ;)**

**Reviews make me want to write more . Although I am very much enjoing this story. :D**

**xoxo Monica and Anastasia 3**

**IF YOU REVIEW YOU GET A SPOILER FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER!**

**Push this button**

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	5. Blast to the Past

**Okay here is Chapter 5!**

**It is SO long. It was almost 7 pages long and its over 2500 words!**

**Thank you so much to all of my reviewers for reviewing and thankyou once again to my amazing Beta who added some humour to the story.**

**Sadly I probably wont be able to update until Wensday (But theres a chance I will) School is starting for me again and I do play a few sports but I will do my best for you guys.**

**Well without further interuption here is chapter 5**

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><p><strong>Sonny's POV<strong>

I walked down the busy halls of my school. It was lunch for the grade Nine's at Turner's High School. I walked to my locker trying to hide my face so no one would notice me. I got to my locker and opened my lock. A single paper fell when I opened the blue metal door.

_Sonny, I have been hiding my feelings from you for a long time._

_ Please meet me behind the stairs at lunch_

_Xoxo Lucas _

I felt my mouth fall open. Lucas had a crush on me? I quickly shoved my books into my locker and ran to the main stairwell.

I smoothed my hair and pulled my sleeves down a little farther to hide the cuts on my wrists that I had made last nigh. Yes I cut, but only when Jessie does something horrible to me. Take yesterday for example, Jessie and her Jewels as they call themselves, had written "LOSER!" on the back of my coat.

I had to throw out my only coat, and it was January so it was-12oC outside.

As if that wasn't enough they had locked me outside for hours before a teacher had found me blue lipped and shivering.

They tortured me everyday. I was hoping this wasn't another one of their sick pranks.

I walked around the stairs to find Lucas standing there with a red rose. I walked up to him and he handed me the rose. "You look beautiful Sonny" he said.

"Thanks" I said looking into Lucas' hazel eyes. I felt a blush creep onto my cheeks. I smiled this wasn't a joke. For the first time this year something good was happening to me.

Lucas ran a hand threw his sandy brown hair and yelled "Okay"

I was just about to ask him what he was doing when Jessie and 2 of her Jewels, Samantha and Jasmine came down the stairs.

I looked at Lucas hurt and anger in my eyes "You set me up" I accused him. He shrugged and went over to kiss Jessie on the lips. One of his hands slipping under her skin tight green shirt. Jessie slapped away his hand. "Later" Jessie whispered to him. She smacked his but and then walked over to me.

"Well if it isn't Fatty Ali" She said using her regular nick name for me.

"What do you want Jessie" I asked trying to get around her.

"Well I don't want anything. But Jasmine sure does." she said pointing to jasmine who had a pair of scissors in her hand.

"What are you gunna do, cut me?" I asked in an annoyed tone. I really could care less if they cut me. They couldn't do more damage to me than I did to myself.

"If only we could" she said taking the scissors from Jasmines hands. Jasmine and Samantha came over and grabbed my arms. One of them put a blindfold over my eyes then they both held me while I heard Jessie cutting something. After about ten mintues I felt them let go and heard their feet as all three of them ran away.

I undid the blind fold to fin myself in cut up clothing. My jeans had slits all the way up to the waist band and they were cut at my knees making my panties visible at every angle. I had basically no shirt left on. The sleeves were left, (Thank god!) and about an inch under the neck was left. The rest of the fabric was in a pile on the floor along with something else. My hair I realised! I felt my head where my hair was cut right off on one side and a diagonal cut on the other side making it look like a slide. Jessie had even cut the tongues out of my shoes and my shoelaces off.

What would I tell everyone. My mom was going to be so disappointed in me. I though with tears in my eyes.

I decided I would have to get some new clothes as I was completely exposed and someone could walk down the stairs at any second. I opened the door to find easily over a hundred people standing there with cameras and cell phones taking video and pictures of me. Jessie and her posy were right up front laughing at me, as was everyone else.

I ignored the laughter and ran half way across the school to the girls change room in the gym. It was completely empty considering it was lunch time.

I collapsed to the floor and started crying.

I had no other clothes here and I had no idea what I was going to tell everyone. There was no way I could cover up my hair and I would be walking around in socks the rest of the day.

I pulled myself off the floor and started going threw the lockers trying to find something else to wear. I ended up in bright orange booty shorts that said 'KISS' on the but and a light blue tee that was easily 3 sizes to big.

There was nothing I could do about my hair but try to put it in a bun to make it less noticeable. Though it didn't help much.

I decided to throw out my shoes, there was no way I could save them. I also ditch my long sleeved shirt, I had bracelets on so they would cover most of the cuts.

The bell rang signalling the end of lunch for the grade nine's. I walked threw the hall's towards English, one of the many classes I had with Jessie. I entered the class late and sat down at the only available seat at the very front of the class. I could hear everyone whispering and trying to suppress their laughter. Half of the school had probably seen the videos and pictures by now.

I put my head in my hands and let the tears run my cheeks. I grabbed my pencil sharpener and played with it until the blade came loose.

I put my hands in my desk and took off my bracelets. I put the blade up to my wrist pushing hard against the skin and dragging the blade across my wrist. I did that a few times before I dropped the blade feeling somewhat better. I raised my good hand and asked to use the washroom. Mr. Spreeson mumbled a "go ahead Sonny" and I ran to the washroom.

When I got there I ran my bleeding wrist under the tap and washed out the cuts. It took a good 5 minutes to get the bleeding to stop and when I finally did get it to stop I didn't waste a second. I ran up to the second floor going to my locker where I had numerous extra sweaters in case something like this ever happened.

I quickly ran back to English to find everyone working on some project.

Mr Spreeson signalled me to his desk. "Mrs Monroe considering you missed over 20 minutes in my class today I believe you wont mind staying after school to make up for the missed lesson." He said clearly frustrated that he was going to have to stay later after school.

"Of course not Sir, I apologise for missing so much today." I said pulling and innocent smile. He sighed and told me to go back to my desk telling me to work on my vocabulary from yesterday.

I started to walk back to my desk when at the last second one of Jessie's Jewel Paula, stuck out her foot and tripped me. Everything seemed to happen in slow motion after that.

My foot caught hers and I started to fall.

I heard the whole room burst into laughter because I tripped.

I tried to catch myself but just ended up stumbling forward.

I felt another hand push me side ways though I couldn't see who's it was.

My head hit a desk hard and I started to hear a loud ringing. The lights suddenly seamed to be really bright and I closed my eyes to block it out. I felt my body hit the tilled ground as I lost all sound and sight.

I woke up a few hours later in the hospital to find my mother standing over me. I didn't remember anything and I was told I had been out for over 7 hours with a mild concussion.

Lucky for me the nurse's hadn't changed me so they didn't see my cut's. It was a close call.

The doctor told me that everyone in the class said I had tripped over the side of a desk and bashed my head into the opposite one. The story didn't really seem to fit but there was nothing I could do. The only thing I could remember was the date and what I had eaten for breakfast.

When my mom had asked me what happened to my clothes and shoes I couldn't give her an answer because I had no memory of what happened to them. I found what had happeded later that day when I saw all of the video's and photo's of me on my flitter.

**Chad's POV**

I woke up at around 8am the next day, Sonny wasn't up yet. We did have work that day but I decided to let her sleep for another half an hour considering she didn't have to be at the studio until 9:45. Now normally I have to be at the studio for 8:30 but I am Chad Dylan Cooper and they can wait for me. If they say anything about me being late they are fired! M'lady is much more important than taping episode 18 right now.

I half expected Sonny to be up before 8:30 but she never did wake up.

I walked down the hall to Sonny's room. I got to the door and knocked, when no one replied I opened the door.

Sonny's alarm was going off. I looked over at the bed to see Sonny wide awake on the bed, eyes as wide as saucers and full of fear. Her wrists were bleeding and so were her ankles. Both were tied with a thick, rough rope. Her wrists had been attached to the head bored tightly, leaving her no room to move. Her ankles were crossed and the rope had cut off her circulation to her feet. The rope had been tide to her base bored but lose enough that she could squirm a little. There was a gag in her mouth and tears streamed down Sonny's cheeks.

I ran forward and took the gag out of her mouth for her.

Sonny coughed a few times before she finally got her breath.

"Oh my god Sonny are you okay who did this to you?" I exclaimed worriedly.

I brushed a piece of hair out of her face in an attempt to calm her down.

"Jessie got in last night and tied me up! But can you please untie me before we play twenty questions, I have to pee so bad!" She begged I didn't waste a second to run to the kitchen and grab some scissors thinking it would be faster than trying to untie the knots.

I ran back to Sonny's room and cut her free.

Sonny examined the cuts on her wrists for a second. She swung her legs over the edge of her bed and stood up just to fall right back on her face. There was evidently some trauma to her feet and she couldn't walk. Jessie had really gone to far this time!I helped Sonny up and pulled her into my arms carrying her into the bathroom.

I sat her on the floor next to the toilet and closed the door behind me as I left.

Sonny came out a few minutes later hair brushed and wounds cleaned all traces of blood gone. The only evidence that she had been tied up were the bright red gashes on the side of her wrists and ankles, and her eyes still bloodshot and puffy from crying.

She was walking now but it was obviously hard for her and painful.

I went over and picked her up into my arms again and carried her over to the couch.

"I can't believe she did this to you" I said looking at the deep cuts on the side of her wrists and ankles from the ropes.

"Jessie has no limits to what she will do to me" Sonny said. Moving into my lap and grabbing my hand. She started to stroke my hand in an effort to calm me down.

I kissed her cheek and looked at her wrists again.

"Sonny its not safe for you here alone. Think about what would of happened if I didn't stay." I shuddered at the thought. "Your not staying here anymore. I'm not going to let Jessie hurt you." I said. "I don't have anywhere else to go." she said "and I'm not quitting my job because of her." "Of course your not. But your not staying here. Your gunna come live with me." I said trying not to leave any room for debate or argument open. "

Chad I can't do that!" She yelled.

Sonny is stubborn and she wont admit she needs help. Sometimes not even when she needs it more than anything. But I wasn't going to let her stay here. I would handcuff her and drag her to my house if that's what it took.

"Of course you can Sonny and this isn't open for debate. Your not staying here." I said getting up off the couch. "Well come back for your things after work. Your moving in immediately."

I picked Sonny up off the couch and grabbed a pair of her blue flip flops that were sitting by the door among quit a few more pairs of shoes, heals, boots and sandals.

"Chad I'm not dressed" She cried trying to get out of my hold. "You have clothes at the studio" I said calmly as I put Sonny's flip flops on her stomach and carried her out the door. "You will survive until we get there" I chuckled, her reaction was such a Sonny reaction. (If that makes sense?) I kissed her cheek as I put her in my car.

She smiled at me and pulled me in for a passionate kiss. Her tongue ran alone my lip and I opened my mouth giving her access.

Sonny was first to pull away both of us breathless. I rested my forehead against hers. "I love you Sonny." I whispered "I love you Chad … and thank you" She said"Anytime Sonshine" I chuckled, that seemed to be my new catch phrase. I kissed Sonny's lips quickly and made my way to the drivers side of the car.

As I drove I couldn't help but think, about what we were going to face at the studio's as we were both now late and because of Sonny's condition. I wonder if Sonny will tell the Random's about all of this.

I hated Jessie Hamilton and I hadn't even known her for 2 days. Sonny has had to deal with her for years. I don't think I have ever gave Sonny enough credit, she is strong. I don't think there's anything that Sonny can't face, but I know for a fact that together, Sonny and I are unbreakable.

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><p><strong>So there is Chpter 5!<strong>

**Like last time, if you review and have messaging, I will give you a spoiler for the next chapter**

**Review!**

**xoxo Monica and anastasia :)**


	6. Sonny's Surprise!

**Im Excited Chapter 6 is uppp :) **

**Im going to let you all get straight to the story now. **

**Disclaimer: I DONT OWN SWAC!**

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><p><strong>Sonny's POV<strong>

When we got to the studio Chad and I immediately went to my dressing room so I could change. I settled on some skinny jeans (But not to skinny so I wouldn't get SPS again!) a funny graphic tee that had an orange saying "you'd be nothing with out me" to a glass of orange jus on it, and a black leather jacket. I threw on some bracelets and some black boots (I decided to ditch my sandals) and me and Chad walked to the prop house.

We found the place empty and Chad took the liberty to sit and pulled me onto his lap. Chad kissed my cheek from behind. "I love you Sonshine." He whispered quietly into my ear.

"I love you to" I said as I turned on his lap to face him. I pulled him in for a passionate kiss just as my whole cast walked in, including Marshall all wearing happy looks.

Well they all had smiles on their face until they saw Chad and I.

"Oh gross", "My eyes they burn!", "Ewwww!" and some other stuff were all yelled at the same time from my friends.

I pulled away from Chad with a blush on my cheeks. "Hey guys, what's up?" I asked innocently

I heard Chad chuckle from behind me and I elbowed him in the ribs.

Tawni was the first to speak up "We have a surprise for you!" She screamed running over and pulling me up off Chad's lap.

Tawni and I had become very close, she was still very self-loving but she did care about her family, and that now included me and almost Chad.

"Really?" I perked right up at the news. I loved surprises. I squealed and I heard Chad stand up behind me.

"Come on Sonny!" Nico yelled as everyone left the prop house. I grabbed Chad's hand and followed behind them excitedly dragging a not so enthusiastic Chad along behind me.

Everyone had ran into the cafeteria and had blocked something behind their back.

"Ready" Zora asked me. I nodded. Everyone moved out of the way revealing my surprise!

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><p><strong>What could the surprise be? <strong>

**I wonder lol. **

**No I know what it is **

**Review xD**

**Xoxo Monica :)**

**Haha, no Im not that mean, **

**back to the story. **

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><p>I gasped as I felt the smile fall from my face. There, sitting at the table was Jessie.<p>

"Hey Sonny!" She yelled excitedly and ran up to me.

Chad pulled me close to him, as I was too stunned to move, and wrapped his arms around me protectively before she could touch me.

"What are you doing here?" I asked her my voice the same as if I was ordering a pizza, that's how shocked I was.

"You didn't know?" she asked her tone implying that she already knew the answer to her question.

"Didn't know what?" I asked her. Surely Marshall would have told us if we were getting a new cast member and I would have had some sort of say in it … wouldn't I?

Jessie interrupted my thought by answering my question. "Well, Mr. Condor is my uncle, and I have always wanted to be on TV. I was going to join Mackenzie Falls" her eyes roaming to Chad and she winked at him. He gave her a cold glare in response "but when I heard you were on So Random! I thought I should join. It will be just like when we were in school together! Isn't that great?" She squealed (extremely loudly) in her squeaky voice that sounded to me like a dying cat.

"Yeah! Great…" I said as I heard Chad breath a silent "hell no" behind me.

I squeezed his hand to calm him down. Jessie's mouth started to run again. "So I talk to uncle Condor and her got in touch with Marshall. I had the idea of meeting everyone and making it a surprise that were going to be working together!"

"Yeah" Grady interrupted her then, she's so nice Sonny you had great friends back in Wisconsin." Everyone nodded in agreement huge smiles on their faces.

Inside I was falling apart, I wanted to run and fall off the face of the earth, I wanted to disappear and never come back. The only thing that was stopping me was the hands that were holding mine tightly right now, supporting me threw this. If it weren't for him I would be running away in tears right now. Using all of my power I forced a huge Sonny like smile to my face

"How long are you on with us?" I asked praying the answer was only one week.

"Well uncle Condor has put me on the show for a month, but he said if I'm good enough he will consider making me a permanent member of So Random!" Her voice was enthusiastic and happy, as a long time friends voice would have been. But the eyes no one but Chad and I could see were full of power. Her eyes laughed at me as if saying "Ha I win again bitch, and there's NOTHING that you can do about it"

I couldn't take it anymore I smiled and said " Really that's awesome Jessie" then turned and left.

As soon as I was out the door I ran straight to Chad's dressing room, not wanting to risk the chance of her sharing a dressing room with Tawni and I also.

I slammed the door behind me locking it and slid down the door onto the floor where I started to bawl. Jessie had ruined my life for so long!

Getting this job was supposed to be my ticket out of my miserable life into a great new start. I was supposed to be happy, safe and far away from Jessie here. My thoughts made me cry harder.

My head started to spin and I felt myself falling apart. I ran into the bathroom that was attached to Chad's dressing room and dug around in the drawers until I found a pair of little scissors in a nail kit. The sight of Chad having a nail kit almost made me laugh. Almost. This will have to do for now I thought as I opened the scissors and brought the thin blade down to my wrists. I started to feel better as I took out all my hatred, starting to feel in control again for the moment.

I was cleaning out my cuts when I heard a nock on the door and Chad's voice calling out my name. "Sonny? Are you in there?" I heard the door handle jiggle as he tried to open the door.

I grabbed my jacket off the floor. I didn't even remember taking it off, and went and opened the door crushing him to my chest the second I saw him. I felt tears start to brim in my eyes as he rubbed my back.

"What am I going to do Chad?" I asked him looking up and meeting his eyes.

"I-I … I don't know Sonny" He whispered, his eyes looking young and helpless.

I put my head on his chest just taking comfort in the fact he was here with me, and reminding myself that this time I wouldn't have to deal with Jessie alone. Chad held me and stroked my hair for a few minutes as I calmed down.

"Sonny I really think its time to tell your cast about your past." Chad said, his eyes not meeting mine, and I knew why. The tone of his voice told me that he knew there was a possibility Jessie was out to get me fired, and if I couldn't get her off the show first, I was very likely to be going.

I sighed. This wasn't something I had ever planned on telling anyone, m past was something I liked to put behind me. But now my past had comeback to haunt me as my present. I could easily see where Chad was coming from, and I knew he was only thinking of what was best for me, but I felt myself shaking my head.

"They might kick me off So Random! because I cut Chad, or I might get Mr Condor mad!" I said.

"Sonny, I don't think there's any other option right now." he said sadly.

I knew he was right, but I refused to accept the truth. "Can I just give it a few days first?" I asked him. He nodded, "Sure, I'm sure we can think of something else." He said. failing miserably at covering the hopeless tone in his voice.

We sat in silence until 9:30 when he asked me the one question I still hadn't decided on an answer yet. "Are you going to stay for work today?" he asked.

I thought about all that was going on. I wanted to cover my lie still, so I would have to pretend to like Jessie for now, and avoiding her 24/7 wouldn't be a good way to do that. I also knew that if I decided not to go to work that Chad would also take the day off. He had already postponed filming today. I remembered clearly the angry voice the director had used with Chad warning him to be ready to film by 11. I was going to have to do it.

"Yeah" I said smiling up at him. "Ill be fine."

Chad chuckled "You can't lie to me Sonny, I know your scarred." He said with a half-hearted smile on his face. "Let me walk you back to stage 3."

Chad took my hand and I grasped it tightly, I was probably hurting him but he didn't complain.

He stopped at my dressing room. He pushed me gently up against the wall beside the door and gave me a very quick peck on the lips. "Good luck" he whispered, his breath tickling my ear. Then he turned and walked away. I pushed up off the wall and took a deep breath, preparing myself for whatever faced me behind that door. "As long as I have Chad I can do this" I whispered before pushing the dressing room door open.

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><p><strong>Well theres the Chapter :D<strong>

**Sorry for not sending spoilers but I wrote this like 20 minutes ago so I didn't see a point.**

**I will send spoilers if I can message you, and if you review next time. I PROMISE! Even if its 2 minutes before the chapter is posted I will send spoilers. **

**REVIEW!  
><strong>

**Xoxo Monica :)**


	7. Blue

**Hey guys SO SO Sorry it took so long to update.**

**2 weeks ago I had a compitition and last week was my birthday so I couldnt update.**

**But I have an amazing chapter to make up for it.**

**I Hope you all LOVE it!**

**Enjoy!**

**I dont own SWAC yo ... incase you didn't know already...**

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><p><strong>Sonny's POV<strong>

I opened to the door and felt like crying in relief when I found the room empty. I collapsed into Tawni's chair and pulled off my jacket and bracelets.

Tears pricked at my eyes when I looked at the cuts on my wrists. Guilt consumed me as I thought of Chad and what he would think if he saw what I had done to myself. I sighed, he would without a doubt be upset, however I also know that he wouldn't hold it against me. I didn't deserve him yet I couldn't let him go. He loved me unconditionally and I loved him. He was necessary to my survival, he made me happy. He made me safe from the girl who wanted to destroy door swung open and I fell of the chair. My whole cast walked in, Including Jessie. "I told you she would be in here." Zora said. "Though I don't know why she's on the floor" "Common Sonny we don't even have an hour before lunch." Nico yelled coming over towards me while I laid on the Randoms! lunch started at 1:25 and finished at 2:10. Mack Falls' Lunch started at 1 and finished at 2:30. One of the many advantages of being the number one teen drama series: longer lunches.

Not that I was complaining Monday threw Wednesday Chad would come to the prop house and just hang with my cast and I until lunch. He would always eat with us (saying his cast was messed) and then he would spend the extra 20 minutes after lunch with me in my shared dressing room. Thursdays and Fridays he would come watch the last of our rehearsals and then drop me off after lunch.

Nico came over and offered his hand to help me up. I reached up to grab his hand when a look of terror crossed his face as I grabbed his hand.

"Oh my god Sonny! What happened to you wrist?" He cried as when he saw my scratched up wrist.

I quickly removed my hand from his grasp as Tawni, Zora and Grady ran over to see. All of their faces held a look of pure horror as they saw the cuts. None of them seemed to notice Jessie as she slipped quietly out of the room. I knew what they were seeing: horizontal lines that went from one side of my wrist to the other, and a deep gash threw the middle (the result of Jessie's latest prank).

"God Sonny what happened?" Nico said again.

I rolled my eyes and kept a calm face so my lie would seem truthful. "I was over at Chad's the other day and his cat clawed me." My lie was smooth and realistic.

Everyone's faces relaxed at my explanation and Nico pulled me up.

"Don't we have a sketch to write?" I yelled.

My cast cheered back and left my dressing room.

I stayed behind to put back on my bracelets and grab my jacket. After I had put everything back on I leaned against my vanity and heaved a sigh. "That was to close" I mentally slapped myself for being so forgetful.

Just as I was about to step out the door someone covered my eyes and started to push me forward. I was to frozen to move. "This is why Jessie had stepped out, to get me afterwards" I thought. The thought seemed to snap me out of me trance and I started screaming a blood curling scream. I felt the pair of hands move from my eyes and onto my mouth. I took in my surroundings now that I could see. I was in the prop house and everyone was starring at me with an amused look. Everyone including Jessie.I ripped the persons hand off my mouth and turned to find sky blue eyes starring at me with a frightened expression.

"What the hell Chad?" I screamed.

I heard everyone else burst into laughter at my reaction. My glare shut them up and I dragged Chad out of the room and outside.

I pushed him up against the bricks of the building and then wrapped my arms around his neck.

"I though you were Jessie" I cried as he wrapped his arms around my waist. I pushed my face into his chest and sighed "Why would you do that?" I asked my words jumbled from the fabric. Though Chad seemed to understand.

"Sorry Sonny, I wanted to surprise you. I didn't know you would panic like that." he whispered into my hair.

I felt his nose rub against my neck and then he placed a soft, sweet kiss there.

I pulled back and brought my lips to kiss started out sweet but soon started to get heated. Chad's mouth open and I ran my tong along his lips. My fingers twisted in his hair and his hands slipped under my shirt. He started to caress the bare skin of my hips when we were from behind us cleared their trough.

I pulled away from Chad and saw Jessie standing there looking as smug as ever.

"Chad," she said his name with a disapproving tone. "why on earth would you let your cat hurt Sonny?" she asked, a small (fake) dent forming between her brow.

Chad shifted his weight uncomfortably from behind me "ummm I don't have a cat." he said.

I elbowed him in the ribs but it was to late. Jessie had already started talking.

"Really? Why Sonny, why would you lie to your cast mates? How did you get thoses cuts on your wrist?" Her smile grew as she finished the sentence, thinking she had won. But two could play at this game.

"Well, I don't know how but someone had gotten in my room and tied me up last night. The rope was so tight that it cut me. You know I do feel bad about lying. I should probably go tell everyone the truth." I said to her, power dripping from my every word. Jessie's face fell and she came forward and grabbed my hair pulling me away from Chad.

Chad tried to grabbed me but she kicked him where it hurt before he could get me.

Jessie's tone was not friendly as she whispered her threat loud enough so only Chad and I could hear.

"Now listen here bitch, if you let the beans spill your gunna wish you never came to So Random. Got it?" She hissed, pulled me up so I was forced to look her in the eyes.

"Got it" I whispered.

Jessie threw me to the ground. My arms reached out to catch my fall. My left hand hit the ground and gave out under my weight. I hear it snap under the pressure and I cried out in pain. Jessie stepped on my arm and tears formed in my eyes "Chad!" I cried. Chad pulled Jessie off of me and pushed her into the studio before running back over to me. I was still lying on the ground clutching my wrist when he got back.

"Its broken" I told him threw clenched teeth.

Chad picked me up and took me to my car.

"I don't have my keys, their in my dressing room." I told him before he could put me in.

"Okay well my car is around the other side of the building." he said.

"Put me down Chad, I can walk." I told him.

He obliged and set me on the ground. I started to walk towards the studio but when I got to the door I knew I wouldn't be able to open it.

Chad, luckily wasn't that far behind me and opened the door for me. We walked down the hall and threw the other side of the building.

Chad beat me to his car and opened the passenger door of his car for me.

We arrived at the hospital with paparazzi following closely behind us. The lady at the reception called security to take them out.

Chad and I were rushed into a secluded room and were immediately told to go down to x-rays. They took an x-ray of my wrist and then lead me back to the room. The doctor came in not two minutes after we got back and put up the pictures of my x-ray. Even I could tell it was broken.

"Well Mrs Monroe, your wrist is in fact broken and will need to be in a cast for 4 weeks minimum. "Is your mother here with you?" the doctor asked

"No I live with my boyfriend." I said looking up at Chad. He gave me a small smile back.

"I see" he said, scribbling down notes. "One question. How did you get that gash on your wrist?" he said looking up at me for the first time.

I knew this question would come up, though I had hopped it wouldn't. I was lucky it was my left hand that was broken because it only had one cut on it: the one Jessie had given to me when she had tied me up.

"Its rope burn. I was trying swing off of a rope but it rubbed against my wrists and cut me after a while." I said.

I could tell the doctor didn't believe me but he just sighed and started to put me in a cast. Chad held my good hand as I got the cast and I stared back into his worried eyes; a good distraction from the pain.

"What color would you like the cast?" the doctor asked as soon as he had finished it.

I didn't hesitate a second on my answer. "Blue." I said as I smiled up at Chad. Chad smiled back at hearing the color I had chosen.

It was well after super when we were done in the hospital, even with all the special treatment we had gotten.

It took Chad and I a good 30 minutes to get from the hospital to his car because of the paparazzi.

We decided not to get to fancy for dinner just going threw Mc Donald's and grab big macks. I found that I couldn't eat anything but the fries without two hands. When we pulled up to my apartment I started to gab my thing but Chad stopped me quickly.

" Sonny you don't have to bring in your stuff. Were grabbing your cloths and stuff and then were going back to my house." He said with a huge smile on his lips.

I didn't take much to Chad's, just a medium sized suit case full of cloths and other necessities.

When we pulled into his house (well it was more of a 3 story mansion!) Chad took all of my things except my purse and dumped them on the floor in the living room.

I put my purse down and fell onto the couch.

"Chad," I whined "feed me my burger please" Chad just laughed at me and grabbed the Mickey D's bag off the floor and started to feed me.

When I was done we put on Madagascar and just relaxed together. I had my head rested on Chad's lap and I curled into a ball facing the TV. Chad had an arm draped over the back of the couch while his other ran threw my hair gently.

I must of fallen asleep because when I opened my eyes I was in bed lying next to Chad. I didn't remember the movie ending and I certainly didn't remember changing into my pyjamas. Chad was breathing lightly next to me in his king sized bed. I turned and snuggled against his chest.

Giving his cheek a light kiss. "I love you" I whispered to him softly.

I was so tired I fell back asleep in seconds. My week had already been crazy and it was only Monday. I was definitely **NOT** excited for tomorrow.

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><p><strong>Well ... How was it?<strong>

**Isn't Jessie Just horrible? I dont like her at all.**

**Next update will hopefully be next weekend.**

**IF ANYONE IS INTERESTED IN BEING MY BETA PLEASE MESSAGE ME! I WILL BE ACEPTING BETA"S WHEN I AM ELIGABLE (middle of april) I will take about 3 per subject so dont hesitate to message me!**

**Xoxo Monica :)**

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><strong>l<strong>  
><strong>l<strong>  
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	8. AN good news

**Authors Note. SUPER IMORTANT!**

**Sorry I hate doing this but this is an authors note not an update. You can now follow me on Twitter and like me on Facebook. Facebook: Slow and Simple (under writter), Twitter: Slow and Simple art_says_moreFollowing/liking me will give you update dates, previews and part of chapters, never before read poem's and story's, and the chance to connect with to give you opinions on my story. PLUS MUCH MORE!Please like/follow. Chapters will be up soon BTW. Xoxo Monica ****J**


	9. A Chad Dylan Cooper Diva

**Well Chapter 8 is done, I hop you enjoyed it. **

**It would of been up sooner but I fell asleep writing it the other day ... OUPS :P**

**I hope you enjoy this chaper.**

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><p><strong>Sonny's POV<strong>

I woke up the next morning alone in Chad's bed.

My head and wrist were throbbing. I could hear my pulse in my head.

I heaved a sigh and flung the blankets off of me. The air was chilly and made me shiver, but I left the room to go find Chad.

I knew he was in the kitchen as soon as I opened the bedroom door. The smell of eggs and bacon hit me like a brick wall and I quickened my pace as I realised how hungry I really was. I flittered down the stairs and found my way into the kitchen.

Chad was seated at a bar stool with his back facing towards me; he clearly didn't hear me come down. I went up behind him and wrapped my arms around his torso and rested my chin on his neck.

"Mind sharing that?" I asked, kissing his cheek and nudging my nose into his neck.

"Your awake!" He said in a mocking tone.

Chad turned his stool around so that he was facing me. His hands found the small of my back and he pulled me close to him. I perched on the ends of his knees and locked my hands around his neck. He pulled my face to his and our lips met in a sweet kiss. His hands moved up my back to my hair and I found mine reaching for his golden locks. I ran my fingers threw his hair and then hit him in the head with my cast when my other hand followed the firsts lead. I felt Chad chuckle against my lips, and then he pulled away.

I couldn't help but pout. The cast already proved to be a pain.

Chad laughed at my expression and gave me a quick peck on the lips. (That was not at all satisfying)

"How's the wrist?" he asked as he played with my fingers on my good hand.

I knew I couldn't lie to him, he knew me to well. "Its sore" I said "How's your head" I asked, trying to lighten the mood.

It worked, he smiled and rubbed his head in fake hurt.

"Its pretty bad" He responded. "Awe poor Chad." I rubbed his head with my right hand. His expression was comical as he gave me a puppy dog face with an over exaggerated pout and started nodding.

I laughed out loud and pulled his face to mine. Not two seconds later our moment was interrupted by Chad's phone buzzing beside us, letting him know he had a text. He pulled us apart and typed a few letters before putting down the phone. "Is everything okay?" I asked

"Yeah everything's fine. Just letting the studio know we wont be in today." he said, his tone expressionless.

I was a bit confused on why we weren't going to work today. I was fine. But then again I wasn't about to start complaining. I was happy to have a day of just Chad and I, no So Random! or Mack Fall's members, no paparazzi, and best of all no Jessie. "Do you want the rest of this" Chad asked signalling to his plate of toast, eggs and bacon. I nodded and hopped on his lap before he could get up and finished his breakfast for him. "What do you want to do today Sonny we have a whole day to spend together with no one to distract us." Chad said. His voice getting happier by the second. I couldn't help but smile at the thought. We hardly ever got to spend time alone, just the two of us. Someone was always with us, or interrupting or moment.

"Well," I started "all I really need to do is go home for a bit and get some more cloths from my apartment. But, I also want a tour of your house and we should just spend time together." Chad smiled I knew he liked the sound of alone time just as much as I did.

"Chad, where are your parents? You never talk about them." Chad had told me as little as possible about his family when we first started going out. He told me his family used to be very close, but when his mom and little sister died in a car crash he dad just started to work a lot more.

Chad interrupted my thoughts with a loud sigh.

"I haven't really been honest with you Sonny. When my dad left I was only 11. He called on my birthday and on Christmas for two years and then I lost contact with him. I get a letter from him once a year with the payment for the house and some extra money but never has a letter or anything for me. To be honest I don't even remember what my dad was like. Its been years sense I've talked to him." Chad said.

"Chad, I'm so sorry" I said putting my hands on the side of his face. His eyes were closed and he was looking at the ground. "Chad, please look at me." I said as I attempted to pull his face up.

Chad then opened his eyes and pushed me gently off his lap. He ran out of the kitchen and up the stairs. A few seconds later I heard his door close. I sat there for a few seconds unsure of what to do. I didn't know if he wanted to be alone or not. I laid my head on the counter and pushed away the now empty plate. I stayed like that for a few minutes before the silence started to become uncomfortable.

I got up and walked up the stairs slowly, to Chad's room. I opened the door and walked in. Chad was laying on top of the blankets with his back towards me. I walked over and rubbed his shoulder comfortingly.

"Do you want to be alone?" I whispered, not wanting to be the one to break the quiet. Chad turned to face me and grabbed my hips pulling me towards the bed. He pulled me close to him and hid his face in my neck, giving it a gentle kiss.

I ran my hands threw his hair "You okay?" I asked? Chad took a deep breath and looked up. "Yeah I'm fine sorry" He said with confidence in his voice. "You sure?" I asked him"Yeah I'm good, do you want to go get your cloths now?" He asked I nodded. I was definitely still worried about Chad but now probably wasn't the best time to bring it up.

Chad pulled me in for a heated kiss. His lips were rough against mine. I moaned and ran my fingers threw his hair. (Being careful not to hit him with my cast this time.) Chad rolled over so I was on top of him, straddling his hips. The kiss ended all to soon when air became necessary.

Chad pulled me into his side and we sat there for a few minutes. Me with my head on his chest and him with his arm around my waist.

"We should go Chad." I said as I got up and took his hand dragging him across the bed. Chad chuckled and got up.

"You should probably fix your hair first" He said. I looked in the mirror and gasped, my hair was a mess. I glared at Chad, he was such a … a Chad Dylan Cooper diva sometimes. "Don't worry," He said. "the sex hair looks good on you." I could only stand there with my mouth hanging open as he smacked my butt and walked out the door.

Twenty minutes later (when I had finished fixing my hair) we were in the elevator going up to my apartment.

The elevator "dinged" signalling my floor and the doors opened.

Chad and I stopped in our tracks when we heard a scream followed by a low thud.

"Is that coming from…"

"Yes" I interrupted Chad and ran over to Jessie's door.

"Sonny this could be a set up. You don't need to do this to yourself." Chad pleaded with me as I walked over to the door.

"Yes I do Chad, I cant let something bad happen to her and not do anything about it." I said. "Now are you going to help me or not?" If I got hurt at least I would know I was the better person. But how would Jessie know I was here? She couldn't unless she has cameras hidden everywhere. I was fairly sure this wasn't a setup, and if it was I have Chad with just nodded and I knocked furiously on Jessie's door.

A man in his fifties opened the door. "May I help you?" he asked"Who are you I asked?" This man, I had never seen before, why was he in Jessie's apartment?

"I am Jessie's Step father, James Fuller, and who are you?" The man said Just as I was about to respond, figure crawled out from behind the couch. I had to compose myself quickly as I saw it was Jessie. I had looked just long enough to see her mouth a silent "help me!" before Mr Fuller turned and looked back into the apartment.

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><p><strong>WELL? What did you think?<strong>

**This chapter was so much fun to write. A big thank you to Anastasia for the story idea. :D**

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	10. We Started The Dishes

**Hey guys so here is Chapter 9 :D  
>I hope you like it<br>ENJOY**

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><p><strong>Sonny's POV<strong>

"Can I help you?" Jessie's step father ask.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and tired to keep my voice as even as possible as I answered James.

"Uh, yeah. I'm uh Sonny, Jessie's cast mate. We were supposed to rehearse tonight." I said nervously. Forcing myself not to look at Jessie's figure behind the couch.

"I'll go get her" James said as he slammed the door in mine and Chad's face.

When I heard his steps vanish I ran a hand threw my hair.

"Oh my god" I whispered, as I fought to hold back the tears of shock and fright.

Chad took my hand and pulled me to his chest. But I pulled away when I heard footsteps coming towards the door.

Jessie opened the door, her face had a red mark across it and tears stained her cheeks. Despite my hatred toward her I took her hand and pulled her to the elevators. "Were gunna take you somewhere safe Jessie." I told her as we left the nodded and pulled her hand out of mine.

The ride home (or rather back to Chad') was very uncomfortable.

There were three of us and Chad's car was a two seater. Jessie and I squeezed into the passenger seat. A very awkward silence fell over the car very quickly. I took Chad's hand in mine and we sat like that the rest of the ride home.

When we got to Chad's I took Jessie to the guest room that I was supposed to be sleeping in, but had ditched to stay in Chad's room.

"Jessie, I know you don't like me much, but I will listen if you want to talk." I said. "I know what's going on now and I promise I wont judge you or betray you in anyway."

Jessie sighed. "My dad died when I was six, and my mom remarried that monster when I was eleven. He's been abusing me verbally, physically, and sexually since I turned thirteen." Jessie paused and look up to my eyes. "Sonny I'm so, so sorry I have givin' you such a hard time. I - I…"

I stopped her rant and pulled her in for a hug.

She froze for a second and then hugged me back.

"Don't worry about that right now. At the moment I just want to make sure your safe. You can stay here as long as you need to, your safe here." I promised her.

Despite all that she had put me threw in the past, I now knew why she had done it. I wouldn't judge her. I was going to have to tell her about what she had done to me eventually, but now was certainly not the right time.

"What about Chad? He doesn't like me, he wont want me to stay here."

Her voice was sad and hopeless. I had never seen her like this.

Jessie had always been an over-confident, self-centered, well … there's no other way to put it other than, she had been a bitch.

Never in a million years would I have guessed she'd been abused.

"Don't worry about Chad. I'm just so glad your safe." I told her whole heartedly. "There's some of my cloths in the drawers over there" I said as I pointed to the shiny oak dresser on the other side of the room. "feel free to use them."

I went to leave but Jessie grabbed my wrist. For a second I panicked, but when I saw her eye's I knew she wasn't going to hurt me.

"Thank you Sonny" She whispered. I smiled "Anytime. If you need anything Chad and I will be downstairs."

I left the room and found Chad in the kitchen.

"What happened?" Chad asked me as he wrapped his arms around my waist. I leaned my head on his shoulder and told him everything Jessie had just told me.

"Are you going to tell her about this?" Chad asked, as he ran a hand down my scratched wrist.

"Not today, but I will eventually." I told him. He nodded in understanding. About an hour later Chad and I started dinner. We decided to make it easy on ourselves and just made pasta.

After we finished our dinner Chad and I started to do the dishes. I say started because we hadn't even filled the sink and Chad had already put me up on the counter and pressed his lips against mine. I wrapped my legs around his waist and started to deepened the kiss when Chad suddenly pulled away.

"Sorry," he said.

But It wasn't me he was talking to, he was talking to a very embarrassed looking Jessie who was standing in the doorway staring at us. "you can come in Jessie, well behave." He jokedJessie gave a small smile and walked in the kitchen. I hopped off the counter and gestured for her to have a seat on one of the bar stools. She sat down and looked between both Chad and I.

"Sonny," She addressed me "your so lucky you have Chad. You don't know how long I've wanted someone like that." I felt my mouth fall open as I realised what she was saying.

"Your, Your jealous of me?" I asked. Completely baffled by the order thoses words took.

She nodded "Yeah. You just seem to have the perfect life, everything is great for you. That's why I made your life so, er, difficult. I was jealous that you had everything, and I wanted you to know how I felt everyday.

"But you had everything." I said. She seemed to think about it for a second. "I may have looked like I had everything but I was so depressed and lonely. You have always been so happy with what you have, and who you are. I've always wanted that." She saidHer voice was so brutally honest and truthful. I couldn't doubt what she had said.

If only she knew the truth. If only she knew how sad and depressed I was because of her.

I nodded, not meeting her eyes and excused myself. I went up to mine and Chad's bedroom and laid on the bed with my arms wrapped around myself.

That's how Chad found me an hour later, half asleep on the bed.

He sat beside me and ran a hand threw my hair, comforting me with his touch.

"You okay?" he askedI nodded and climbed into his open arms and rested my head on his shoulder.

I don't know when I fell asleep but I woke up later the next morning alone in the bed. Chad was watching TV downstairs alone.

"Morning" He said kissing me gently on the lips. "Good morning" I replied, resting my forehead on his. "Jessie up?" I asked.

Chad nodded. "Yeah, but I don't think she wants to come down. She just grabbed a drink and went back upstairs."

She must of been getting hungry.

I went to the kitchen and made breakfast for the three of us.

I knocked on Jessie's door and hear he mumble a quiet "Come on in."I opened the door and set the food on the desk in the room.

"You hungry?" I asked.

"Yeah thanks." she said.

I nodded and went to leave but Jessie stopped me.

"Don't leave." she whispered.

"Pardon?" I said.

"I don't want to be alone, I've spent my whole life alone. I just want a friend right now." She said.

I sat beside her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

"Come downstairs. Me and Chad are watching _Finding Nemo_." I said.

She grabbed her half eaten breakfast and followed me downstairs.

Chad was sitting in the love seat with the TV on the menu for _Finding Nemo. _I went and sat on Chad's lap. Jessie sat on couch next to the love seat.

The movie was about 15 minutes in and Chad was running his fingers alone my wrist.

"Sonny, what's that?" Jessie asked me

"What's what?" I asked, having no idea what she was taking about.

"That on your wrist." She said pointing to the wrist that Chad was running his hand on.

"I don't know what your talking about." I said hoping for her to brush it off. But she stood up and came over pulling up the sleeve of my jacket.

"This. Oh my god. Sonny, how did you get that?" Jessie asked as she noticed the cuts on my wrist.

"Ummm" I said.

"Sonny, are you cutting?" She whispered.

I mentally groaned. Why couldn't I of broken both wrists?

"Uh, well you see…" I started.

"Oh my God, you are." she yelled.

I hopped off of Chad's lap and ran upstairs. Locking the bedroom door behind me.

I heard someone knock on the door.

"Sonny open up." I heard Chad's worried voice say as the door knob jiggled.

"Sonny?" He said my name again. There was silence for a few seconds before a click was heard and the door swung open to reveal Chad with a key.

"Go away." I snapped, angrier than I meant to. Chad acted if I hadn't spoken and pulled me into his arms. I cried for a few minutes while Chad held me. When I looked up Chad's eyes were worried, yet he was hiding something.

"What's wrong?" I asked Chad.

"Nothing." He said.

"Chad" I asked starting to get worried.

"She, ummm, she left." Chad said.

"Where? Did she go home" I asked worried for her. "She's going to get hurt." I screamed getting up and running out the door.

Chad caught me and reassured me she wasn't going home.

"Where's she going?" I asked, very frustrated mind you.

"Sonny, she went to the studio." He said. I felt like passing out.

"She's going to tell the rest of my cast." I said. His eyes were sad as I ran out the door. Chad was right. I should of never trusted Jessie Hamilton. NEVER!

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	11. A Guide To The Female Gender

**Hey Guys, Here is Chapter 10.**

**Its done early so I may not update this weekend because of this.**  
><strong>Cheek my facebooktwitter page to see when my next update will be.**

**Thank you so much to all of my reviewers. You inspired this early Chapter :D**

**Enjoyyyy!**

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><p><strong>Sonny's POV<strong>

Seething with anger I practically kicked down the door to my dressing room. Jessie and Twain were sitting together laughing; Tawni on her vanity chair and Jessie on Tawni's couch.

I dove at Jessie, knocking her off the couch and pinning her on the ground.

"How could you Jessie? After everything I've done for you!" I screamed in her face.

She was terrified, it was clear on her face. A tiny part of me felt bad for putting her threw this. Considering she's been abused for years, this would no doubt bring back bad memories. However I was to angry to care.

Chad came up and pulled me off of Jessie, and pulling Jessie up after me.

He dragged us into an empty room.

"Why would you tell Tawni I cut? You haven't changed a bit." I yelled in Jessie's face, as Chad held me back.

Jessie moved back into the corner covering her face. "Bu-but I didn't tell Tawni, I wasn't going to tell anyone. I thought you would want me to leave; so I did." said Jessie.

Guilt washed threw me as I realised my mistake.

"Oh." I said, extremely embarrassed. "Sorry."

Believe it or not, that was the start of a beautiful friendship.

The next few days Jessie and I became extremely close.

Even Chad seemed to like her.

We were almost even a family.

I found out that Jessie and I had a lot in common. Turns out she was bullied a lot to, but by her older sister. We also both had a love for comedy. She really did want to join So Random! and she was good at it.

Chad seemed to be amused by the situation, one day were not speaking, and the we realise we have something in common and were all of a sudden best friends.

"I don't understand the female gender" He started saying one day, though I knew he was happy that I found a friend.

I could probably even call her my best friend.

But there was also a down side.

First of all, my wrist was still wrapped in hard plaster, thanks to my pain in the butt cast. My cast mates were still in the dark about my cutting, Jessie's father was on the hunt for her, and I still hadn't told Jessie about why I cut.

But I decided to push away all that away and enjoy the moment.

"What time is it?" I asked as Chad pressed his lips to the corner of my mouth.

"Alone time, also know as 10:14." He whispered in my ear.

"Chad, Jessie will be up soon." I said.

Though my words were pointless because as I finished my sentence I pressed my lips to his.

I turned in his lap and straddled him, pressing my body close to his.

"Not what I want to wake up to guys" A voice filled the silence of the room.

"Thanks Jessie. You've always been great at ruining a moment" I said as Jessie came in and pushed me off of Chad's lap to plant herself there.

Knowing it was a joke I decided to play along.

"What? How long have you guys been doing this behind my back?" I screamed.

Chad looked terrified, like a baby dear with a giant monster truck driving at full speed towards him. I laughed and kissed Chad quickly. It would have been longer but Jessie pushed me away.

"You ruin the moment again." I sighed, deciding to get myself a drink.

It was true. Jessie had managed to walk in on Chad and I every single time except for one. (that being because we locked the door and ignored her furious knocking) … but still, she was very, very good at interrupting us. Not that I minded, much.

"Anyone want a drink?" I yelled out to Chad and Jessie. "No." They yelled together. I chuckled. My life had gotten so good in a week.

'About time!' I thought.

Rehearsals on Tuesday went great!

We were doing a Sally Jenson; Kid Lawyer, sketch.

A little boy "Nico" is suing his Math teacher "Jessie" for failing him. … Yeah, its funnier than it sounds.

Anyways, Jessie, me and the rest of the Random's all meet Chad in the caf for lunch.

Although Jessie and I are the only one who likes him.

It was about twenty minutes into lunch, when Jessie threw herself off her chair. The rest of the cast was extremely confused by Jessie's odd behaviour, however Chad and I knew what she was doing once we saw he step dad walk in the cafeteria.

Chad and I got under the table with her.

"Jessie, your in costume. You look like an old math teacher, everything's going to be fine." I reassured her.

She nodded and ran out of the cafeteria.

Thankfully her dad didn't see her, unfortunately he caught Chad and I as we were trying to walk out. "Hey kids, do either of you seen Jessie? She's been missing ever sense she went to your apartment Sonny." He said. His tone was friendly with a bit of worry in it, but his expression was murderous.

"No sorry, I hope you find her." I said. He glared and moved on to the next closest table of people (with a much kinder expression) and asked them the same question.

Chad and I didn't hesitate to walk out of the cafeteria and run only to have Jessie pull us into a closet.

"What do we do guys?" She asked, panic filling her voice.

"Were going back to my house." Chad said.

How would we get to his car though? It was on the opposite side of the studio, and we couldn't risk getting caught.

"To risky with your car so far away" I said.

They both nodded in understanding.

'Think' I told myself.

How could we get out of the building. Or at least to another door without being seen by anyone? By brain seemed to turn on then.

"Is there a vent in here?" I asked.

"Yes" Chad said pointing up to the top corner of the small closet.

"That's our ticket out of here" I said. They both nodded.

We used Chad as a foot stool and then got him to climb up the wall.

The vent could luckily support us all and we got to a door close to Chad's parking spot without a problem. We all ran to his car and drove home.

The studio didn't need us after lunch on Tuesdays, but normally we would stay to hang out.

When we got back to Chad's the reality of our situation finally hit us. Even if we hadn't been caught by Jessie's step father today, he had still found us.

I slipped away from Chad and Jessie who were talking.

I ran quietly to the unused bathroom and dug around in the drawers until I found what I was searching for…

Before anyone could notice I was gone, I went back downstairs and curled up on the couch.

"You okay Sonshine?" Chad asked, kneeling in front of me.

I shook my head.

Both Chad and Jessie came over and wrapped their arms around me.

"Everything's going to be okay, I wont let anything happen to either of you." Chad vowed.

"Thank you." I whispered.

I nudged my head into Chad's neck.

Bad idea.

Chad sighed. "Sonny? Why?" As Chad asked his eyes fell on my wrist.

I turned my wrist so they couldn't see the cuts, but I knew both of them already had.

"Sonny this may be kind of personal, but why did you start cutting?" Asked Jessie.

"Umm, I was in a difficult situation. Now I'm just kind of addicted to it. I don't know any other way. But I've gotten better ever since Chad has started to help me." I said trying to have the topic dropped.

No such luck.

"What was the situation?" Jessie pressed.

"Bullying" I said simple, knowing I wouldn't be able to make anymore excuses.

Jessie seemed to think about that for a second before it finally clicked.

"Wait, I made you start this?" She asked in a pleading voice, as if she was begging us to tell her she was wrong.

When Jessie got no response from me or Chad she knew she was right. "Oh my god! Sonny I'm so, so sorry, I had no idea. I wouldn't of done anything if knew that I was doing this to you." Jessie apologized.

"Well you didn't know did you? You can't ever know." I snapped.

When I realised what I had done I immediately apologized.

Truth be told, I didn't hold Jessie responsible for anything I has done to myself. That was all my doing.

"Sorry Jessie, you know, that was the past. Why don't we just start over?" I asked her.

"I would like that" She said.

Chad was beaming at us as I got up off the couch and I held out my hand for her to shake. Jessie stood up as well.

"Hi I'm Jessie." Jessie said.

She grabbed my hand and shook it.

"Hi I'm Sonny."

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><p><strong>Well what did you think?<strong>

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><strong>You'll get Chapter spoilers and will be the first to know the update days!<strong>

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	12. High School Musical SpongeBob and ICarly

**Hey guys, I am so so sorry that I havnt updated in forever!**

**But Im back so thank you to everyone who is still currently ready this story!**

**Oh and BTW I dont Own SWAC :( I do however own Jessie Hamilton MWAHAHAHAHAAHAHA okay anyways... Heres the next chapter**

**Xoxo, Monica :)**

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><p><strong>Sonny's POV<strong>

Later that night I found myself walking up the stairs to my shared room with Chad.

I promise nothing is going on, but seriously we're 18, do you expect us not to sleep in the same room if given the chance?

I walked threw the door and found Chad starring at the TV. "Hey Sonny, coming to bed?" He asked, not letting his eyes shift to meet mine. I rolled my eyes and went over to see what show currently had my boyfriends attention.

I let out a loud snot as I saw the figures on the screen. "High School Musical? Really Chad?" I laughed out loud and hit him in the face with a pillow.

Chad could be such a child sometimes, he still LOVED the show Sponge Bob, and ICarly. I get it if people like to watch them occasionally, but no, Chad fired his director because she wouldn't let Chad have the day off to watch an ICarly marathon.

"Sonny please, its not High School Musical, Its High School Musical 3" he argued. Once again never taking his eyes away from the dancing couple.

"Right, well I'm going to get ready for bed" I said as I grabbed a pair of black short shorts and a blue tank top that matched my cast. Ewe, casts. I'm so glad it will be off next week.

I slipped into my cloths and bushed my teeth well. After removing my make up and washing my face I paused a second to look in the mirror. I could see the years of suffering hidden in my eyes. I sighed and looked at my abused wrists. I didn't want to live like this anymore. I was better than self-harm. It was going to be very hard, but somewhere deep inside I knew I could live without it. I also know it was time to let go.

I walked out of the washroom and turned off the TV.

Chad sat up and gave me a look that said _What was that for? _

"HEY! What was that for?" Chad cried. Do I know my boyfriend or what?

"Can we talk?" I asked in a small voice as I sat down on the bed.

"Sure, what's on your mind Sonshine?" Chad asked now talking seriously.

I took a deep breath and looked at his blue comforter. "I want to stop cutting" I whispered not meeting his eyes.

I felt his fingers under my chin and then he pulled my face to his in an urgent kiss. I responded after a second, knowing that he would support me. His tong rand along my bottom lip asking for entrance. I opened my moth and easily let him slip his tong into my mouth. His fingers ran threw my hair and mine follow suit. I was first to pull away gasping for air. Chad kissed my forehead. "I love you so much Sonny." He whispered.

"I love you too"

Chad drove Me, Jessie and himself to work the next day.

Chad and I walked hand in hand down the hall way. We were all laughing as Jessie talked about a new sketch idea she had for this weeks show.

We entered the prop house to find that we were the first ones here.

"Odd, were normally not the first here" Jessie said as she plopped on the couch.

Jessie and I were still very close. Her and I were now the closest out of all the Randoms. We were the female version of Nico and Grady.

As I sat down I noticed something. "Jessie, thoses shoes are so cute, where'd you get them?" I said in a very sarcastic voice as I pointed towards the shoes.

"Oh er, ya, I kinda borrowed them." She said rather awkwardly.

I laughed, "Its fine" When she made a move to protest I shook my head. "No, really its fine, they look great with your outfit." I said, and I meant it.

She was wearing my silver gladiators and a really cute light purple dress that stopped just above her knees. Her blond hair was straightened and it fell just below her shoulders.

Oddly, Tawni and Jessie didn't that much alike. Jessie had a darker shade of blond hair than Tawni and green eyes rather than blue. She was shorter than I was at 5.1 and had a very slim figure. Not that Tawni was fat.

"Thanks" Jessie said as she smiled and picked up a magazine.

"You look much more beautiful" Chad whispered in my ear as I leaned my head against his shoulder.

I was wearing dark blue skinny jeans (But not to skinny) and knee high light grey boots. I had on a long light green top that was semi covered with a light grey zip-up hoody. I felt a blush rise to my cheeks as I murmured a thanks.

Chad was just starting to lean in for a kiss when Nico and Grady walked in.

"Don't even think about it Cooper." Nico yelled as he leaped over the table to sit himself beside me.

"Cooper shouldn't you be at the falls by now?" asked a young and crazy voice coming from the vents.

Chad looked at his $572 watch and jumped up. "Shot, I'm late" he yelled as he ran off.

"Chad race!" Nico and Grady yelled simultaneously as they to ran out after Chad.

"Ohhh I love watching Chad races" Tawni said as she watched the three boys run out of the room beside her. "My moneys on Nico!"

I rolled my eyes at her. "So what's on the agenda today guys?" I asked. "Well, when thoses two goofs get back we need one more sketch for the show. The rest of the day is rehearsing." Tawni said as she filled her nails.

**Tawni's POV **

As I filled my perfect nails I noticed something unusual, I saw a scratch on Sonny's wrist.

"Sonny, What happened to your wrist?" I asked. Not that I cared, or was worried at all. Pshhh no, what are you talking about.

Sonny bolted up and looked at her wrist. "Oh, er, Jessie's cat scratched me."

"Yeah" Jessie agreed quickly "Mr. _cough_ um, excuse me, Mr. Catty is horribly scratchy!" She yelled.

"Awe, I had a cat! But Sonny put him threw the paper shredder!" I said giving a nervous Sonny a cold glare.

I barley registered the horrified expression Jessie had on her face as I told her about the tragic ending of Puddy 2 Shoes.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Sonny and Jessie exchange a look. I knew something was up. I have no idea what, but something is up, and I Tawni Heart, am going to figure it out no matter what it takes!

"Zora" I yelled in a whispering voice at the vent in my dressing room.

"You called Tawni?" Zora said as she opened the left vent.

"Shhhhhh. Shhh. SH!" I said as I looked around the room to make sure no one had heard us.

Zora rolled her eyes. "No ones in the room Tawni, you don't need to be quiet." Said little miss know it all.

"Right. I knew that." I said as I straightened my shirt. "Anyways, something is up with Sonny. I have a feeling Jessie and Chad know what's going on. I want you to figure what Sonny's hiding. Okay?" I asked.

"What's in it for Zora?" The little rat said.

"A chance to go on a mission" I said knowing that the little snoop liked any chance to go on a mission.

"No deal, but you have fun figuring this out." Zora said as she slammed the vent shut.

"Fine" I yelled. The vent opened a crack. "One pound of cold cuts" I said.

"Two!" Zora yelled back.

"One and a half!" I said.

"Two and a half!" She yelled.

"Three and a half!" I cried.

Zora smirked. "Deal" she said as she slammed the vent closed once again.

Sonny … umm, well Sonny better watch out because I Tawni … I Tawni, am going to figure out this little secret of hers no matter how many pounds of meet it takes me!

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><p><strong>Well theres the chapter :) <strong>

**Hopefully I will review fast this time. (I promise I will) **

**Please review and tell me what you thought. **

**Xoxo, Monica :)**


	13. Trust CDC

**Hey please take a second to read this! **

**So, I know I haven't posted in FOREVER, but as you probably guessed I have been dealing with self harm as well as other things myself. It wasn't good for my recovery to be writing this so I hope you understand why I had to stop. However, now I am doing much better and I have received numerous messages from this story so I have decided to finish it. You will have to bear with me as I am in school and part of many extra curricular activities so I wont be able to post as much as I would like, but I do not intend to abandon this story. **

**Also, when I was writing this I was younger and I didn't have a plan to where this story was going, but now I have an idea of what I want to do so there is an ending in sight. **

**I want to thank you all for following this story and supporting me. You don't know how much it means. **

**I hope you all enjoy this chapter and know that I will post again soon! **

**Moncia xoxo**

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><p><strong>Sonnys pov<strong>

The morning sun floated though the windows making the prop house glow. It was a Friday, the best day of the week in my opinion, and we had a late start to the day as everyone stayed longer yesterday to prepare for today's show.

Jessie walked lazily beside me in a short yet classy navy blue dress covered by a cropped jean jacket. "I think I need a belt with this" She murmured to me as I plopped myself down on the couch.

I nodded. As good as the outfit looked, I knew a belt would complete the look. "A beige one would be good." I suggested. She must have agreed with me because before I could get out another word she was running full speed out of the prop house to our dressing room.

Marshal had finally decided to add in another closet for her clothing because, even though Jessie was given her own dressing room at the start of her job, she never used it and proffered spending her time with Tawni and I.

I pulled out my script for today's show and re-read my lines to busy myself while I waited for someone to come to the prop house.

_Pig 1: Word has it that the farmer is gunna be choosing another one of us._

_Pig 2: I wonder where they all go, I bet its some place filled with fresh mud! Not all this dried up stuff we've been rollin' around in!_

_Pig 1: If that's the place they go then I would love -_

My reading was cut short when a loud bang pulled me out of my thoughts.

I looked up expecting it to be one of my cast mates, but the room was as lonely and still as it had been a few minutes prior.

I got up from my seat and walked over to the Prop House entrance.

Nothing.

I felt the fear rise into my throat as I wondered where the noise had come from.

No one was currently using the room upstairs and there was nothing around the room except empty halls. Whoever made that noise was someone in the room, and someone who was not looking to get caught.

I faintly started to hear footsteps approaching, the noise growing louder until they came up behind me.

I turned around swiftly to see Jessie's face covered with worry. Her breathing was fast and shallow, like she had just been running.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

She opened and closed her mouth a few times and tears filled her eyes. "My step dad was just walking though the halls." She chocked out.

My body froze with panic. James was back, I wouldn't doubt that he was back looking for Jessie. He had to know she was here. She had become a regular actor on So Random! There was no way to hide that.

I grabbed her hand not really noticing what I was doing, but I pulled her through the winding halls to the one place where I felt safe.

We entered the Mac Falls set, ignoring the guard who was standing at the door. He had seen us walk in and out many times and we paid no attention to one and other. We went around back stage, walking quietly as to not disturb the filming as we made our way to Chad's dressing room.

I opened the door and pushed Jessie onto the couch not wasting time to fall down beside her.

"We'll just wait it out here. When Chad comes back to the dressing room we'll get him to send his security guard out and sweep the halls." I murmured to a still panicked Jessie.

"Mhm" She replied faintly.

"Hey" I whispered wrapping an arm around her shoulders comfortingly. "It will all be okay. Somehow, this will all work itself out." I told her praying that my words were true.

I couldn't help but realise what a mess my life was. My mother had been gone for weeks, for a while I had not been able to live in my home because of the risk of being attacked by the girl sitting next to me, and now I still couldn't go home as the girl who had once been threatening me was now being terrorised by her step father.

All of this pilled with the addiction that constantly had me weight down made me feel beyond horrible.

I felt the all to familiar urge start to build inside me. The feeling to do the one thing I knew would calm me down and make everything okay … for a while. But I didn't want to. For the first time in a long time, cutting didn't seem like the option. I now saw more than one paths.

And at that second I needed nothing more than for my boyfriend to hold me and tell me everything was going to be okay.

As if he was reading my mind, not a minute later, my gold haired blue eyed boyfriend walked through the door.

Hs eyes met mine and the smile that covered his face dropped.

I leapt up out of my perch on the couch and all but dived into the confused yet worried arms of my boyfriend.

A sob escaped my lips as his arms caught me and wrapped around my back.

"What's wrong, Sonny?" He whispered as more sobs started to leave my mouth.

It didn't take long, soon my sobs turned into hysterics as I cried on his shoulder. I felt so weak and vulnerable, and the thought only made my sobs stronger. I wrapped my arms tightly around Chad. He dragged me over to the couch and pulled me into his arms whispering sweet nothings into my ear. This soothed me, he was quite honestly the most amazing guy ever. Not only was he cute and charming, but he cared for me deeply and told me I was beautiful all the time, whether I was dressed in sweats or a designer dress. He continued to hold me until I calmed down enough to talk.

"Sonny, are you okay?" Jessie asked, rephrasing the earlier question as she also rubbed my back.

"I just, I feel so lost right now." I wailed.

It was true. I had no idea what to do, I was so scared and beyond confused. My mind had lately been a winding maze with no findable exit, and no matter how desperately I tried, I could not escape.

Chad's arms held me tightly, his grip seeming to hold me together. "I love you, Sonny." He whispered, his warm breath giving me shivers.

He placed an innocent kiss on my cheek.

For the moment, that calmed me enough for me to push back all this anxiety and emotion that seemed to be flowing out. Jessie was the one we needed to be worried about, not me.

"Sorry," I said wiping a few tears from my cheeks. "Jessie's step dad was here."

Chad instantly tensed at this, I knew he had not forgotten what had just with me, but I also knew that Chad would realise that I would rather talk with him alone later about this. Though Jessie and I were good friends now and told each other a lot, there were still some things that I needed Chad for … and only Chad.

Surprising me and Jessie both, Chad's worried expression soon became one of determination. He sprung up from the couch putting his Iphone in his back pocket and then helping the both of us up.

"I have a plan, and I need you both to trust me for this to work."

Later that day, after rehearsals Jessie and I were making our way to the caf to grab some lunch.

Our other cast mates had gone ahead of us, and the two of us strolled lazily down the halls of Condor Studios.

"I am so excited for our show tonight, Sonny!" Jessie squealed happily from beside me "These are some of the best sketches we have ever made!"

I nodded "I know, I have trouble not cracking up while we do them, and normally I'm pretty good at keeping a straight face."

"I swear, if any of you laugh during any seen I don't think I'm going to be able to keep my cool" Jessie said letting out a chuckle.

Before I could respond, Jessie had come to a halt beside me, I turned my head questioningly at her, wondering why she had stopped. Her face was a ghostly white, eyes staring straight ahead.

I followed her gaze to see the enraged eyes of the man we had been trying so desperately to avoid. Jessie's father stood in front of us his smile not matching his angry eyes.

He lunged forward grabbing Jessie by her hair.

"You!" He screamed "How dare you run away from me, I own you, you are mine!"

To say I was frozen to the ground was an understatement, I wanted desperately to pull Jessie into my arms and protect her from this human monster, but I couldn't.

My eyes flicked quickly down to Jessie's face, her eyes were wide and frightened , but not a tear fell from her eyes as she gazed up at her step father.

He raised his right hand high in the air, I closed my eyes as I head the sound of skin meeting.

A bunch of voices starting yelling then, making words I could not pick out. Arms wrapped around me and started to drag me somewhere.

I opened my eyes only when the cool nights air hit my skin.

A man I didn't recognised continued to pull me.

He were talking to me, but I wasn't listening. My eyes scanned through the people trying to find Jessie.

I squirmed and the arms that were holding me loosened. I ran inside where Jessie's step father was sitting on the ground in handcuffs. Jessie stood a good ten feet from him behind a uniformed man. More men pilled around James, some spectators trying to see what was going on and uniformed cops like the one that had pulled me out of the room and was currently speaking to Jessie. I then finally spotted Chad.

I ran over to him and he pulled me into a massive bear hug "Sonny," he whispered "you did so good, my plan worked perfectly. We got everything on camera and the officer took down James before he could hurt Jessie. There have been other officers that have gathered other information on this case, Im not lawyer, but im pretty certain he's gunna be locked up for quite some time." Chad said happily.

I pushed myself onto my tippy toes and connected my lips with Chad's. I poured everything I had into the kiss, all the hurt, confusion and worry. But now, there was also peace. Jessie was now safe from her step father. I knew nothing could take that away form her right now.

Only when air became necessary did we part. I put my forehead against his and he slipped his hands into my back pocket. "Good" I said simply, smiling up at him.

Jessie chose that moment to come and find us.

I took my arms from around Chad and wrapped her into a tight bear hug. She was crying, that I could tell, though I wasn't sure if it was happy tears or not. She responded to the huge eagerly.

I pulled away and brought Chad into our hug. I smiled when I heard a quiet "Thank you" come from her lips.

We spent the remainder of lunch in the hall, a few detectives wanting statements from Jessie to add to their notes.

When it was all finished we thanked the detectives and grabbed a quick bite before we made our way to the set to help set up for the show tonight.

Jessie was pushing a wagon on stage when she discreetly pulled me aside.

"Sonny, I want to wait till next week to tell the rest of the cast what has been going on." She whispered into my ear. "I don't want this to affect the show or bring anyone down today, okay?"

I wanted to object, the cast would support her and be there for her, but she knew secrets of mine and she had respected my wishes, so I would do the same for her.

I nodded and gave her a quick hug.

We put on our best So Random! Smiles and finished setting up for the show so we could do what we both loved to do, GET SOOOOOOOO RANDOM!

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><p><strong>Yay, everything is okay with the step dad :)<strong>

**REVIEW!**


	14. Finally Opening

**NEW CHAPTER!**

**A new character is coming in to this chapter, one you all know. Its towards the end. **

**Its mostly Channy, and there is a heated scene so be warned if you are uncomfortable with that! **

**I havent been to overwhelmed with school ... YET so I will hopefully have the next chapter out early next week if not this weekend! :)**

**ENJOY!**

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><p><strong>Sonny's POV<strong>

Chad and I sat on his bed later that night watching TV (and not any of his shows) I had put in friends because seriously, who doesn't love friends?

The silence between us was a little less then comfortable, however as I could feel Chad's eyes watching me. I knew why, he was wondering about my break down earlier, what could have possibly triggered such a violent and sudden outburst. Truth be told, I didn't know.

My mind seemed to have control over itself, I knew cutting was not the answer, but I had an addiction and when you have an addiction, nothing seems logical anymore. There had to be some way to get help, I couldn't afford to go to a treatment center (both financially and time wise) also, I couldn't see a therapist without tipping off the pap (and with them; the world) about what was going on. But I know this needs to stop, I want it to stop, but I don't know if I can, and that scares me

Just then the TV paused. The faces on the screen stopping in comical positions that made a smile come to my lips. Chad turned to face me, running his hands up and down my jean covered legs.

"Sonny, we need to talk about this eventually" he said knowing I would figure out what he was talking about

I squirmed uncomfortably, Chad was my love, and I trusted him, but I was nervous. Could I tell my perfect boyfriend how terrible I really was? How broken I was on the inside when on the outside I looked … well, sunny.

I looked away from his blue eyes "I don't know what you want me to say, Chad"

His hands stopped their movements on my legs. Chad then took my hands in his and pulled me close to him so we were sitting cross legged face to face on the bed.

"Please, Sonny" He begged "tell me what's wrong. It kills me to see you so sad and fighting so hard, I don't ever know if you're smiling because you're happy or if its because you wants me to think you're happy! He yelled getting louder and louder as he spoke. "I feel so helpless and it is _killing _me to not be able to help you more. Please," he said again, more softly this time. "please just tell me what's going on."

His desperate tone broke my will and with that, I gave in.

"I honestly don't know what happened today, Chad. Everything just pilled up I guess and … I broke." It was the truth, I hoped he could understand what I was saying.

He nodded his head, signalling me to continue.

I took a deep breath in, knowing this wasn't going to be easy to say. "I - I can't begin to explain how broken I have been for the longest time." I began "You know ever since I was a kid I have been having problems but you don't know how hard I am struggling. I have a wonderful life and I am thankful for it, but I hate my life because I don't understand anything."

I was in hysterics at this point. I was crying and practically screaming at Chad's blanket (as I refused to look at his face) but I knew I needed to let this out. It had all been bottled in for far to long.

"I don't understand, Chad! Why do I have to be the one to struggle with this? Why was I the one that got the addiction? WHY ME? I'm just so broken, and I don't know what to do anymore." I sobbed finishing my rant.

'Shhhh, Sunshine. Shhhh. Everything is going to be okay." He whispered into my ear. "I love you Sonny."

I simply nodded into his chest, to overwhelmed to do anything more.

We sat in silence for a few moments before Chad started speaking again.

"Sonny, I can't answer that question for you, only you can."

He saw me open my mouth to protest. I couldn't answer that question, I had no idea why I had been cursed with my life. Had I done something wrong to trigger this? Was this all my fault?

I frowned. Chad saw this and continued speaking before I could.

"Maybe you can't answer that question right now, but I promise you, Sonny one day you will understand. I believe that everything happens for a reason, sometimes they just happen out of our control."

I sighed exhausted. Today had been a very emotionally long day and I was glad it was over. I had to keep hope that maybe tomorrow would be better.

"I'm tired" I mumbled to Chad, pushing him down on the bed so I could curl up into his side

To my surprise Chad resisted my push sitting up straight to catch my attention "One last thing, Sonny."

"Yes?"

Chad took a breath and pulled me close to him so our chests were pushed together. "I know I haven't always been there for you, and I haven't always treated you right, but I will always be here for you and I will try to fix you. Things aren't going to be easy and a lot of this is going to be one step forward and two steps backwards, but we have to try. I believe in you and I believe in us. You are so strong, Sunshine and you inspire me in so many ways that I can't even begin to explain. You struggle with so much by yourself but still manage to stay strong through it all and keep a smile on your beautiful face. When you want to give up you keep fighting and through everything you remain selfless. Sonny, remember its okay to make mistakes, its how we learn. But don't let them bring you down. I'm here for you and I love you no matter what. I promise."

By the end we were both in tears.

What would I do without him?

"I love you to, Chad. So much. Thank you!" I bawled pushing my face into his neck "Thank you" I said again.

That's how we fell asleep that night, curled up together on Chad bed, both of our cheeks still wet from crying.

It had been an emotional night for the both of us, but we got out so much that needed to be said and we were going to be stronger because of this.

**…**

The next morning I woke up in bed alone, I rubbed my eyes and went into the bathroom attached to Chad's bedroom. I took a look at myself in the mirror and groaned. My hair looked like a rats nest, not to mention my panda eyes that I had gotten last night from crying. I was a mess.

I tried to brush my hair but gave up quickly on that deciding to just hope in the shower instead.

After showering I made my way downstairs and found Jessie and Chad sitting together on the couch watching TV.

"Well good morning sleepy head" Jessie yelled when she spotted me in the room. "Bout time you woke up."

Chad rolled his eyes at Jessie and the three of us made our way to the massive kitchen.

"We were going to wait for you to wake up, but it got kind of late…" Chad muttered awkwardly, looking guilty for eating without me.

I smiled gently walking over to grab some bread to throw in the toaster "No, that's fine, Ill just make myself some toast."

I put the bread in and sat down on a bar stool. Chad walked over and stood in front of me allowing me to hold his hands as we waited.

"Sooooo…" Jessie said making the word fan out for a few seconds longer than normal. "I heard a little of what you guys were saying last night." She said looking like a kid getting caught with his hand in the cookie jar. "I won't pry, but is there anything you guys want to talk about?"

This is why I loved Jessie. She asked not because she was curious, but because she was concerned. We may have had problems - and a lot of them - in the past, but we have both grown up since then and we have become amazing friends.

Chad looked at me. It was his way of saying "You can tell her if you want to, its your call."

I turned to Jessie "How much did you hear?" I questioned.

She squirmed uncomfortable at my question "umm … pretty much all of it"

I nodded, I didn't mind if she knew, I trusted her and Chad and I were yelling quite a bit last night.

"That's fine." I said. "I don't really want to talk about it right now, but if I change my mind you'll be the first to know. Okay?"

Jessie smiled looking relieved that I wasn't mad at her eavesdropping "Sounds good to me! So what are we going to do today?"

Chad shrugged and I didn't answer.

"Well, I have some errands I want to run, if you guys don't mind?" Jessie said.

"That's fine." Chad and I said at the same time.

The three of us laughed together at that and then we all went our separate ways.

Jessie ran upstairs quickly to grab her purse before leaving. Chad and I sat down on the couch not turning on the TV though this time.

"Later love birds" Jessie yelled as she closed the door behind her.

"Well, we have a few hours with the house alone to ourselves, I have a few ideas of what we can do." Chad said suggestively.

He didn't wait for me to respond before he pulled me into a heated and passionate kiss.

I didn't think twice about responding, I straddled his lap as he kissed me. Our lips were parted, tongs exploring each others mouths. Chad's mouth started to move down my neck.

"Chad" I moaned.

Chad's hands reached for my shirt and I let him lift it over my head. His lips went back to mine and I felt his hands moving alone my shoulders, down my back and settle at my waist.

His hand then started to move forward reaching for the button on my pants.

I had thought about sex before with Chad, - though I wouldn't ever admit it - I didn't believe in sex only after marriage, I believed in sex with the one you loved. I did love Chad, and I wanted him.

But I also knew I was young, we had no protection with us at the moment and getting pregnant was not what I needed right now. I wasn't ready.

I figured that out in the time it took Chad to undo the button on my pants.

I pulled away as it came undone.

"Chad, no. I'm not ready." I told him.

Chad nodded "I figured, I love you Sonny and I want you, but I can wait until you're ready." His voice was husky, indicating how much he really wanted me, but I wasn't ready.

After our close call Chad and I spend the rest of the day relaxing and baking. Well, I was baking, Chad watched and ate the food.

It was nice to spend some time alone like this, just the two of us.

Jessie came back about 3 hours later with a single bag. She greeted us casually and asked us how our day was. We told her what we had done - skipping our make out session that almost went to far - and she excused herself saying she had something to do.

Around supper time she emerged from her bedroom with a large smile on her face.

"Great news guys!" She yelled as she ran down the stairs full speed jumping the last few steps "I can move back into my apartment!"

She kept speaking but I wasn't listening. The threats were gone, and I too could move back into my apartment. There was no reason not to. But was it what I wanted? I had spent what felt like so long living with Chad in his house that it felt more like home than my apartment did now.

What about my mother? When she came back what would happen?

"Sonny?" A voice snapped me out of my thoughts.

"Huh? Sorry."

Jessie laughed "did you hear anything I just said?" She asked me.

I tried to keep my tone light as to not let them in on my thoughts "No sorry, I think I was somewhere else for a second. What's up?"

Jessie repeated herself in a happy tone completely unaware to my thoughts. "I said, I was thinking about moving back in tomorrow. As much as I love it here with you guys, and don't get me wrong I am so thankful you guys let me stay here, but I kind of miss having my own place."

I nodded, as much as I didn't agree with her on the feeling of wanting to have my own place again, I understood what she meant. "Yeah, I totally get it." I told her.

She smiled and nodded "I'm going to start packing" She yelled already running up the stairs to her room … or her used to be room.

After getting a taste of living with Chad, I knew I didn't want to go back to living by myself or with my mother. I loved my mom more than anything, but she didn't know what was going on with me like Chad did, and if I wanted to recover I couldn't be living alone. I needed the support of my boyfriend to do this.

I know I want to live with him now. I cant imagine not waking up to him every morning. Or having to fall asleep without him in the same bed. No matter how big this house was next to my apartment, I knew that without Chad it would feel far to big and far to empty.

I knew what I wanted, I just didn't know how to tell anyone this. What if Chad said he wanted his own place for a bit to? Or what if my mother wanted me to stay at home. She didn't know my place was sitting vacant right now.

"What's on your mind, Sunshine?" Chad asked me.

"Nothing, why?" I said. But I knew he didn't believe me by the look on his face.

"Nice try, what's up."

I sighed. "Its safe to go back home now."

"You aren't happy about that?" he asked taking not of my unpleased tone.

To say I was nervous to answer his question was the understatement of the centaury. I had to tell him. I would either get the invitation I wanted or the rejection I feared.

"Umm, well er, I kind of wanted to say here." I said feeling a blush rise to my cheeks.

"You're blushing" Chad noted stroking my cheek but becoming serious again.

"If you want to stay here you are more than welcome to, Sonny. I love having you live with me. And to be completely honest, I don't want you to move back into your apartment."

"Are you asking me to move in" I asked feeling the hope start to build in me.

It was Chad's turn to be awkward now "uh, yes?" He said as more of a question than an answer.

I felt a massive classic Sonny smile spread across my face.

"Of course I will move in with you!" I screamed. Pulling my boyfriend in for a kiss.

Surprisingly, Chad was the one who pulled away first.

"You should probably tell your mom." He noted.

"Oh yeah, I guess I should."

I grabbed my cell and found my mom under my contacts and clicked the call button. She answer after a few rings.

"Hey, Sonny! How are you, Hun?" She yelled excited and peppy as always.

I smiled, excited to tell her the news. "I'm good mom, I just wanted to tell you something."

I looked at Chad and smiled. "Chad asked me to move in."

There was silence on the line for a few seconds.

"Mom?" I said to the speaker wondering if my phone had died.

My question was answer when her voice came back over the line.

"Over my dead body you're moving in with that boy!" She yelled.

"Mom? What do you -"

"No!" She interrupted me. "I want you away from him right now, I'm coming home." She said.

And with that the line went dead.

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><p><strong>Please Review! :) I will answer questions (If they don't give to much away) and send a spoiler to everyone who reviews!<strong>


	15. Sneaky Girl

**Hey, So this is the longest Chapter so far! (So I expect some good reviews ;) Its a little over 4300 words!**

**This Story is coming to an end very quickly and I am not sure if I will do a squeal (It all depends on what you guys want) So let me know in a review. **

**I hope you all enjoy this very long Chapter. I hope to have the next one up in one week at the latest. **

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><p><strong>Sonny's POV<strong>

"What happened?" Chad asked as I started at my phone in a daze trying desperately to wrap my head around what just happened.

"I don't know she just started yelling and then the line went dead."

I blinked frantically trying to hold back my tears, but they wouldn't have it. I felt a stray tear betray me and slide down my cheek. Chad of course noticed immediately and pulled me into a hug.

"Don't cry, Sunshine." he whispered as he pressed a kiss to my forehead.

That set me off. I don't know why but his words did not calm me like he intended to.

"Don't cry?" I screamed "What do you mean don't cry? My life is a mess and you want me to be happy?

I was fuming. I had a very scared Chad pressed up against the wall in fear at my outburst.

"Sonny, I was just trying to-"

I cut him off. "No, I don't care what you were trying to do! I-"

I wanted to say I am done but then I realised I was treating him exactly as my mother had treated me.

My anger left my body immediately and I literally fell to the floor hysterical.

Chad being as good to me as ever swooped me off the floor and carried me upstairs to bed. He tucked me under the blankets and lied down beside me letting me cry into his shirt. I feel asleep like that, curled up safely in my boyfriends arms, safe from everything except my thoughts.

I was woken up abruptly who knows how longer when the blankets were pulled off of me.

Above me stood my mother whom I have not seen in months with a expression of furry.

"What are you two doing in the same bed?" She yelled waking a sleeping Chad beside me.

"What?" He mumbled "Oh hey, Connie."

My mother glared at him and grabbed my arm in an effort to lift me out of the bed. But she couldn't without my help and I was not going to help her pull me away from Chad.

"Don't even try to_ Hey, Connie_ me, Chad" My mom imitated him. "Sonny, get up and pack your bags, we're leaving."

She tried to pull me out of bed again but I wasn't having it.

"No, mom. I'm seventeen. I'm old enough and responsible enough to make my own choices. I'm living with Chad, I love him." I said seriously in a tone that made it clear that this was not something I was willing to negotiate.

"Right, you're 17, so legally you are still mine. Now you better get your butt out of bed, Alison or I will be calling the cops to get you home." She said.

Tears filled my eyes and I knew I could not fight her on this without getting Chad into a bad situation. I would have to move back into my apartment with my mom. I got out of the bed and grabbed Chad's hand. I pulled him out of the bed and walked hand in hand with him towards the door way ignoring my mother the whole time.

My mom stopped me before we could get out the door. "Chad you stay with me, we need to talk. Alison, go pack your bags we're leaving in half an hour."

I glared at my mom as she walked me out of the room and closed the door behind me.

Sobs left my chest as I walked into the spare room where I had put my stuff before moving into Chad's room.

It didn't take long to pack as I didn't have much here, just a few outfits and some other knickknacks around the house. Most of my stuff was in my dressing room or still in the apartment.

I walked back into Chad's room to find him sitting on the edge of the bed with his head in his hand and my mother standing in the corner with another one of my bags. Both looked up as I entered the room. The draw that I had kept my clothing in was open and empty as was the shelf I had used in Chad's massive walk in closet. Seemed like they packed the stuff that I had in here.

"Finished?" My mother asked me in a stern tone.

I nodded not trusting my self to speak without bursting into tears.

"Okay, Ill give you guys a second to say goodbye." my mom said in a much softer tone and walked to the doorway but didn't leave.

So much for privacy.

I walked over to Chad and he pulled me into a massive bear hug. I pressed my face into his neck and finally, my emotions started to come out. Silent tears ran down my cheeks but I was determined not to ruin this moment by crying.

Chad pressed a kiss to my forehead. "I love you, Sonny. More than anything." He whispered so quietly I hardly heard it.

I nodded into his neck and pressed my lips against it. It was my way of silently saying "I love you, too"

We stood for what seemed like no time at all, just holding each other and all to soon my mother cleared her throat and walked over.

"Time to go, Sonny." She said pulling my arm to take me out of Chad's embrace. It was then that both of them noticed my tears. My mother looked sad that I was crying, I could see regret somewhere deep in her eyes. But Chad's eyes were different. They saw past the tears into the misery and depression I was currently drowning in.

Chad stepped forward and pulled me into another strong hug despite my mothers presence. "Sonny, it will be okay. Stay strong, baby." He said.

I don't know if my mother wasn't listening or if she just didn't care because she didn't react to what Chad had said.

She pulled the two of us apart and said in a stern and serious voice "Now, I hate to be the bad guy here, but I don't want you two to see each other anymore. Not at the studio, not after work." my mother turned to look at Chad "Chad," She addressed him "you stay away from her, got it?"

"Yes, Mrs Monroe."

Chad kept a blank expression, not letting his eyes lift from the carpet to meet hers or mine.

With that, my mother grabbed my bags and grabbed my hand walking me outside to her car like a child.

Chad followed out after us stopping on the porch. I reached my arm out to him and he reached back. It was at that moment that his eyes filled with tears.

My mom opened the car door for me and I got in knowing that I couldn't do anything.

My mother got in the drivers seat after tossing my bags in the back and drove off.

I watched in the mirror with tears running down my cheeks as Chad's figure get smaller and smaller until I could no longer see him .

…

It was about five minutes into the drive that my mother decided to try to talk to me.

"So, Sonny" She said using my nick name now "everything went well in Wisconsin. Great Grandma Mary's family is doing much better now." When I said nothing she tried a different tactic. "I watched you every week on So Random! Everyone is so proud back home. How are your cast mates"

Again I said nothing.

I wasn't trying to be rude to my mother, I was simply so sad at the moment I couldn't function.

My mother sighed "Sonny," She said, "I know you're upset, but I hope you understand why I am doing this."

I did understand, to a point, of why she was doing this. She wanted to keep me safe from getting hurt. But, what she didn't understand was that by taking me away, she was raising the chance of me hurting myself.

I saw my mom frown from the corner of my eye and the rest of the drive was spent in silence.

We got back to the apartment not to long later and we made our way in the elevator to our floor.

While we waited for the doors to open my phone buzzed in my pocket. I pulled it out and Jessie's name was written across the screen. I opened the text.

_Hey, Sonny. Chad told me what happened. If you want to talk I am home. _

I replied back _"Yeah I am so upset, were just getting in right now, Ill head over after I drop my stuff off. _

I sent the text and put my phone back in my pocket.

"Sonny, I don't want you texting him either." My mom said.

"It was Jessie." I mumbled frustrated.

My mom shifted her weight looking uncertain about what she was going to say.

"Maybe, you should let me hold onto your phone for a while." She suggested.

That outraged me. Did she want me to loose all contact with Chad? Why was she all of a sudden so mad at me spending time with him? She had loved him before.

The elevator doors opened at the point and Jessie stood in the hallway.

"Its my work phone, mom." I shouted. "You cant take it. I need it for work!"

My mom looked embarrassed from my shouting.

"I'm going to Jessie's." I said and grabbed Jessie's hand pulling her into her apartment before my mom could answer.

"Sonny, are you okay?" She asked me.

I thought about the question for a second. Was I okay? At the moment I couldn't feel anything. The anger I had seconds ago changed into nothing as were all my emotions.

"I'm confused" I decided on that because it was true. I voiced my question I had a few minutes prior to her. "I don't understand why she's all of a sudden so mad at me spending time with Chad. She used to love him and now she doesn't even want me texting him. It doesn't make sense."

We pent the next few hours just talking, her trying to cheer me up and me trying to look happier.

Around 9 I decided to go home and get to bed as it had been a really long day.

"Let me walk with you." Jessie offered.

I nodded and the two of us made the short trip to my door.

Jessie pulled me into a hug before I could go in. "If you need anything or need to talk just call me okay? I will leave my phone on so I will wake up if you call or text." She said. "Everything will work out."

I managed a weak smile. I was grateful for all her support to help me. It was nice to have such a loyal friend. "Thank you Jessie."

"Anytime. Night, Sonny"

"Night"

I walked into the room which felt unfamiliar to me. My mom was sitting on the couch watching TV. I made my was past her not wanting to talk anymore tonight.

"Sonny" She called me right before I entered my bedroom.

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry, sweetie. I know you're upset. But I want you to stay away from Chad, I have asked Tawni to escort you tomorrow around the studio so you and Chad don't go behind my back."

I didn't respond. I turned and went into my room. Did my own mother have no trust in me? I felt like a prisoner, trapped. I was so numb and so empty. I went to my drawer and pulled out the razor I kept hidden in there.

I made a few cuts on my wrist loving to be able to finally feel something again as the razor cut open my skin.

I sat on the floor cross legged just watching my cuts bleed for sometime before wrapping them and putting on some pj's.

I got into bed and pulled out my cell phone dialling the familiar number.

"Hello?" He answered after a few rings sounding tired.

"Chad" I whispered his name so my mom wouldn't hear.

"Sonny, is that you?" Chad asked sounding a little more awake.

"I'm sorry did I wake you up?"

"Don't worry about it, Sonny." He told me. "How are you doing."

"Not well." I admitted looking at the cuts on my wrist.

We talked for over an hour. I told him about what my mother had said about taking away my phone and asked him not to text me first in case she did. I told him about my day with Jessie and how my mother had given me an escort for tomorrow."

"So, I wont see you very much anymore." It wasn't a question.

"Probably not" I said sounding as hopeless as he did. "but I am going to do everything I can to try and get to see you and I expect you to do the same." I told him.

"Of course I will." He said.

I yawned after a moment of silence.

"Get some sleep, Sonny. We can talk again soon."

"Can we?" I asked not knowing the next chance we would have.

"Yes." He said certain.

That made me smile. No matter how bad this situation was, Chad was willing to fight for us. I knew we would make it. We had to.

"I love you." I whispered into the phone.

"I love you to, Sonny. Night."

"Good night."

I hung up the phone after that knowing that if I didn't I probably never would. Tough as I pressed the end button the room suddenly felt very empty and I felt very alone.

Though my bed was a single and Chad had a king, without him, the bed felt much to big and much to empty.

I didn't sleep well that night. Sleep did not come easily and when it did I was haunted with nightmares.

Morning came eventually and I woke up getting dressed in a daze.

I chose a short classic flowered dress with a blue long sleeved cover. I added some necklaces to complete the look and some bracelets in case my sleeve came up. I threw on some black boots to finish the look.

I went to the bathroom doing my make up and brushing my teeth.

When I came out my mom was in the kitchen.

"Sonny," She called "I made you some breakfast."

"Not hungry" I mumbled unenthusiastically as I grabbed my purse and keys and walked out the door to go to work. However, I didn't miss the sad look on my mothers face as I left the apartment without a goodbye.

I made my way to Jessie's door and knocked.

She opened it happily "Ready to go?" She asked.

I nodded.

To say I felt bad for treating my mom so rudely was an understatement. I hated myself for it. But I couldn't bring myself to be in a good mood around her.

Jessie drove us to the studio, her singing loudly and obnoxiously to the music as I stared out the window.

"Sonny, girl you need to cheer up." She said grabbing my hand supportively.

I winced as her fingers hit my bracelet making the scrap against my fresh and sore cuts.

She did not miss this and a frown covered her face. "Rough night?"

"You could say that" I said.

She rubbed my shoulder.

Not much longer we got to the studio and I put on a smile for my cast mates. I think they knew something was up though.

"You good, Sonny? You seem different today" Nico noted as we were talking about sketch ideas.

A chorus of "yeah's and agreements came from the rest of my casemates (minus Jessie)

"Do I?" I laughed.

"Maybe all of that Mac Falls drama is rubbing off on you" Tawni said.

Everyone laughed and I joined in as best as I could.

I missed my Mac Falls star.

As promised, Tawni followed me around the whole day.

Around lunch time she started complaining about how much I was walking around (all part of the plan) and I suggested she switch off with Jessie.

"I dunno, your mom asked me…"

"Okay, well I was just going to go to the parking lot. I think I forgot something in Jessie's car. So well have to get her keys first and then we can go." I said.

"I have an idea!" Tawni yelled "Maybe Jessie should take a turn watching you."

"Good idea, Tawni" I didn't care that she was taking credit for my idea.

I practically ran to our dressing room where Jessie was. I dragged her out of the room muttering something about her car for Tawni's sake."

"What's going on Sonny?" She asked me as I pulled her down the hallway behind me.

"I got Tawni to change escort duty with you and I want to see Chad." I told her.

Jessie laughed "You sneaky girl." She muttered.

We walked on set in the middle of a tapping but I didn't care that they were shooting. I ran to Chad and jumped on him. My lips capturing his.

I paid no attention the others around us.

"Take 5 everybody" Chad said when I finally released his lips.

The three of us walked down to his dressing room in silence.

"How are you doing?" Chad asked me when we arrived.

"I've been better"

He nodded and then turned his attention to Jessie. "Thank you, Jessie." He said pulling her into a one armed hug (as he still had me in his arms)

Jessie shrugged. "No problem."

She then turned to me "are you going to tell him? Or will I have to?" She asked me referring to what I believed was my cutting.

I sighed embarrassed to tell him how weak I was last night. "Chad, I was cutting again last night."

Surprisingly Chad didn't say anything he just held me in his arms. Eventually his hands made his way to mine and lifted them up. He pulled up my sleeves and noticed the deep gashes the lined my wrists.

"Sonny." It was Jessie who spoke her voice full of sympathy.

I suddenly felt very self conscious and pulled my sleeves back down.

The three of us stood in a tight silence for what felt like hours but must have been only a few minutes.

"Say something." I begged Chad as he still hadn't said anything.

Chad sighed and shifted his weight from one foot to the other. "Are you feeling better now?" He asked.

I nodded.

"Good, it kills me to see you so sad, Sunshine." He said tracing the edge of my jaw. "We will work everything out."

Trust Chad (and Jessie) to be the only one who wouldn't be mad at me for cutting. One of the many reasons I loved him. I knew that if my mother ever found out she would have me locked away in a rubber cell somewhere.

"_Chad Dylan Cooper to the set please_." A voice said over the PA.

"Duty calls." I murmured not wanting him to leave as we had spent only a few minutes together and with Jessie here. Not that I minded having Jessie here it was just I wanted to be alone with him for a bit.

He tried to reassure me with a half hearted smile, but it didn't reach his eyes. "Well see each other again soon."

"Mhm." I tried not to let the depression sink into my voice but it didn't work as well as I had hoped.

"Hey, everything will be okay. Promise."

"_Chad Dylan Cooper to the set … Now_." A very aggravated voice said again.

"I got to go, love you." He said giving me a quick peck on the lips before pulling away and running out the door.

"Love you, too." I said, but he had already left.

I stood looking at the door to the dressing room hoping he would come back in but knowing he wouldn't.

Jessie took my hand in hers comfortingly. "Lets get back before they come looking for us." She said pulling me out of the room.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She asked me as we made our way back to stage 3.

I nodded. "I miss him. I need him and I know my mom does'nt understand why but … Its just making recovering hard."

"I understand" She said.

…

The rest of the week went on in a very similar fashion.

I would sneak out with Jessie at times to see Chad for mere minutes. My mother did not know I was seeing him or calling him late at night when she was asleep. My mother and I had started talking again but I wasn't always the friendliest to her.

My cutting was getting worse as the week went by. All this craziness in my life had me drowning in my thoughts. I was not coping well with anything. The only thing that seemed to keep me sane was Jessie. In all of the misunderstanding going on in all of this chaos she was always there for me. Even Chad and I were starting to feel the separation taking its toll, but I was determined to get through this. We would make it. We had to.

It was currently Thursday and we were preparing costumes for our new sketch.

"Sonny should be the surfer, not the astronaut." Nico yelled.

"I want to be the surfer!" Tawni said back.

"Sorry, Tawni but Sonny looks better in the bikini than you do. No offence."

Tawni sulked beside me knowing she had lost.

"Sonny go put this on." Nico told me passing over the bikini and hula skirt.

I took it and got changed quickly.

When I walked back into the room everyone agreed that I should be the surfer much to Tawni's dismay.

"Come here for a sec, Sonny" Tawni said.

I walked over to her.

"The costume would look better without bracelets" She said grabbing my hand and starting to take them off.

I pulled away my hand and started to protest but I knew it was too late.

"Sonny, you have cuts all over your wrist." Tawni said in a horrified and frightened voice.

Everyone turned to look at me then, even Jessie yet her expression matched mine. She didn't have an excuse and neither did I.

"Sonny," Tawni whispered. "Are you cutting?"

"I … I, uh." I didn't know what to say.

"Sonny." Zora said looking horrified. "Why would you do that?" She had tears in her eyes and her usually smart eyes looked terrified. She for once looked her age.

I couldn't help but lower my head in shame.

Grady was next to talk. "I hate to say it Sonny, but you know we can't have you on the show if you are hurting yourself. Its part of the policy."

"We are going to have to tell marshal" Nico added.

I panicked "No!" Tears brimmed in my eyes. "You cant kick me off." I cried.

So Random wasn't just my job, it was my home. These people were my family.

Everyone shook their heads. "We aren't kicking you off, Sonny." Nico said. "You just cant perform on the show until your cuts have healed."

I was relieved that I wasn't getting removed. But I started crying, I had just made a huge mistake. Jessie was first to pull me into a hug followed by the rest of my cast mates.

They eventually took me down to Marshalls office. Where they all explained the situation to him.

"Sonny," he said after everyone had told him what had happened. "I hate to say it but you can't perform tomorrow, not with the cuts on your wrist. If anyone were to see them it would not only set a bad example for children, but it could bring a lot of hate to So Random! And the paparazzi would be likely to create a story over it. I'm sorry, Sonny" He said seeing my sad face.

I nodded.

"I also am required to call your mother and tell her what is going on."

I registered the fear and worry in my body when he said that, but I was beyond feeling at this point. I couldn't react.

He addressed everyone next.

"I know that all of you are taking this hard so I want you all to go home and take the day off. We'll start an hour early tomorrow to catch up." He said "And this stays between all of us." He instructed.

Everyone got up and left at that point.

Jessie, Tawni and I went to our dressing room and grabbed our stuff.

Tawni didn't say anything to me before leaving though she said a goodbye to Jessie as she walked out.

I cried the whole way home. What was going on finally starting to register in me. My mom now knew what was going on. I was going to have to face my mom and explain what was happening.

The 15 minute drive to the apartment went by way to fast for my liking. To make it worse, when we got back to the apartment my mother was standing in the doorway waiting for me.

"I can't do this, Jessie!" I panicked starting to hyperventilate.

"You can. I will be right here beside you." She saw the look of worry on my face. "Your mom won't hate you if that's what your thinking, she will want to help you. Everything will work out, Sonny."

I felt as if everyone had been telling me that lately but it didn't seem to be true. Nothing was getting better, everything was getting worse.

"You ready?" Jessie asked me.

I shook my head no. "I can't do this."

Jessie sighed and opened her door walking around the car to open my door. "I'm right here" she told me.

I got out and together we walk forward to the apartment door where my mother was waiting.

* * *

><p><strong>Review ( if you ask a question I will answer! You also get a spoiler if you review! :D )<strong>


	16. It never Lasts

**Hey, so I wasn't planing on updating yet, but I pushed aside my homework the last few nights to write this! So I hope you guys are thankful. ;)**

**Also I want to thank all of you who reviewed and replied to my PM/Spoiler. You were all SO kind and it really pushed me to finish this chapter as soon as I could. **

**I hope you all enjoy this chapter. I cant believe how close I am to the end of this story! **

**I will not hold you up any longer. ENJOY THE CHAPTER!**

* * *

><p><strong>Sonny's pov<strong>

When my mother saw us walking up to the door she ran outside.

Her eyes and cheeks were red, indicating that she had been crying. "Sonny!" She bawled pulling me out of Jessie's arms into her own. "Baby, come inside. We have a lot to talk about."

I didn't fight her when she took me out of Jessie's arms. I simply followed beside her letting her pull me into the apartment to scared to do anything else.

My mother was unpredictable sometimes, she would often look like she was going to act one way but then have a totally different reaction. I had no clue as to what was going on in her mind or what she mean when she said we _had lots to talk about_.

"Jessie, thank you for bringing her home safely." My mom said to Jessie, her voice rang with sincerity. That was a good sign.

"It was no problem, Connie. See you tomorrow, Sonny." Jessie said before giving us a little wave and walking through her door.

I followed my mother into our apartment and she sat down on the couch indicating me to sit beside.

My mother sat silently for a while before whipping away a tear and turning towards me. "I cant help but feel like this is all my fault, Sonny." She told me in a honest and heartbreaking voice.

I felt a stab of pain when she said that, it was not at all what I had been expecting. That was truly the worst reaction I could think of. I did not want my mother blaming herself for what I chose to foolishly do to myself.

"Mom, no this isn't your fault. A lot has been going on in my life and I haven't been coping very well."

She didn't waste anytime in asking the question I had been expecting at the start. "Is it because of Chad?" However, her tone wasn't accusing like it had been earlier this week. It was more curious and broken.

I hated myself for causing my mom this pain. I was a monster.

"No, Chad has actually been my biggest supporter through this. He has been the one I was talking to when I was down. He and Jessie were the only ones who knew and they were really helping me… that's why we were living together." I defended my boyfriend saying the last part very quietly.

My mothers face turned to one of horror at my words. "I took you away from your help?"

"No" I lied, but she saw through it.

"Why didn't you come to me about this? How long has it been going on?"

I debated on telling her how long I had been hiding my awful secret. My mother always thought we were very close, and to a point we were. I had just never told her about the things I had been doing to myself for years. Could I tell her that this been going on for years. That she had not noticed her only daughter cutting herself for over 7 years.

"Umm… a while. I'm sorry mom, I just didn't know what to do." I said tears starting to fall. "This isn't your fault, please don't blame yourself."

My mother pulled into her arms and it felt good, I had missed my mom so much and being mad at her had taken its toll on both of us. I hugged her back and we sat together for a long time, just comforting each other.

"Sonny, if you ever need to talk, please don't hesitate in coming to me. I love you and I'm here for you whenever you need me."

This made me smile.

"I know, I love you too, mom." I said.

"Is there anything you want to talk about, Hun?" She asked me?

There was one question that had been eating at me but I had been to intimidated to ask. "Why are you so mad at Chad all of a sudden?" I questioned.

Saying his name brought a empty feeling in my heart.

My mother looked embarrassed? That was something I was not expecting "Hun, I don't hate Chad, I was just worried he was going to take you away from me." She said.

So that's what this was about.

"Ill always be your little girl mom." I reassured her gently. "But I love, Chad and I need him. He has taken such good care of me while you were gone, but he never replaced you."

She nodded at this information. "I'm sorry, Sonny for forcing you two apart."

"Its okay." I forgave her easily. I was not one to hold grudges especially towards my mom. She was everything to me, for a long time she was all I had. It had been the two of us in the hardest times of my life yet she always supported me. She had flown away from her family to let me follow my dreams. In my eyes, she was the most amazing person.

"I love you, mom." I told her again.

"I love you, too."

My mother and I spent a good two hours together just talking and catching up on what we had been doing while we had been apart for the last few months.

Things weren't perfect in my life right now, but having my mom back definitely made things a lot easier.

I called both Chad and Jessie that night telling them what had happened. I called Jessie first giving her a long and detailed description about what had happened and she seemed genuinely happy for me.

"I'm glad you and your mother are good again, Sonny. I know what its like to not have a mother and I'm really happy that you are working things out with her." Was what she said.

I felt bad for Jessie she didn't have any family anymore, but I also knew she was happier now that her step father had been put away.

I called Chad straight after and told him he good news that we were allowed to be seen together again.

He was happy at this as pop magazine had apparently posted an article about us being broken up as we hadn't been seen at all together over the last few days.

I had no idea that people were thinking that, but when it really came down to it, I didn't care.

I had gotten a lot of publicity lately as my show had been getting more viewers since Jessie and I had joined the cast and since I had started dating Chad. However, most of it had been fairly good. Nothing bad had arisen lately. Actually nothing bad had been said since the whole "_Sonny gone bad_" thing.

My mother had also said Chad was welcome here anytime he wanted again, though when I told Chad this he seemed hesitant for obvious reasons, but insisted that "CDC does not get scared of mothers". That's Chad for you.

…

As I was told, I was not allowed to be on the show the next day, but I went to work and supported my cast mates in the show from side stage. Chad came down from Mac Falls and watched with me, supporting me as I was forced to watch my friends do what I loved without me. I wasn't easy being removed from my job, it was quite upsetting actually, but I suppose I deserved it for what I had been doing. All actions came with their consequences.

…

It was Tuesday night when Chad finally grew the nerve to come over after work to see my mother. My very nervous boyfriend hardly left my side or said a word while we talked with my mother.

I knew my mom felt bad about what she had done. She tried very hard to make conversation with Chad and try and calm his nerves but it didn't work very well.

"Chad, welcome. Nice to see you again, can I get you anything?" My mother had greeted him.

Chad had just shook his head looking nervously to me to see if he had done anything wrong.

I smiled at him and squeezed his hand in support.

My mother tried again later "So, Chad" She started "I have been watching Mac Falls, how has filming been?"

"Good"

Everything is good between your cast mates?

"Yes"

"Anything you can give as a spoiler?" My mom wasn't lying when she said she followed Mac Falls, she watched it almost religiously. I knew she was hoping he would give her some information, but we both expected what his answer was going to be or rather what it wouldn't be.

Chad just shook his head.

My mother excused herself to the kitchen after that and I pulled my nervous puppy of a boyfriend to my room.

He sat down on the bed as I closed the door.

It had been a while since he had been here, but nothing had really changed.

"Chad, she's not going to attack you." I told him. "She feels bad and wants to patch things up."

"I know, Sonny. I'm just a little uncomfortable."

I couldn't blame him for feeling worried as only a few days ago my mother had said who knows what to him and had gone to great lengths to try and keep us apart.

I took his hands in mine. "I know, its okay." I said

"Normally I'm the one comforting you" He pointed out.

"Well," I said "I'm here for you, too. Always."

I pressed a quick kiss to his lips sealing the promise.

We didn't stay in my room to long as it was getting late and we also didn't want to push our boundaries too far.

My mom was watching a crime drama show on the TV when we came out.

Chad told me he was going to leave and pretty much ran out the door after saying goodbye and pressing a quick kiss to my cheek.

I think he thought that my mother might bite off his head at the sight of us touching. That was the only time we had made any kind of contact in front of my mother with the exception of me holding his hand when he came in.

I sighed as I closed the front door. "I'm sorry, Sonny. I didn't mean to become a wall between you and Chad." My mother said when I had closed the door.

"Yes you did, but its fine. We'll work past this."

I called Jessie that night (as I did every night.)

"Hey, girl!" She said happily when she answered using her usual nick name for me.

"Hey!"

"So how did things go with mom and Chaddy Poo?" She asked.

I laughed at her antics and told her all about how Chad had acted and my mothers reactions.

"I wouldn't worry about it too much, you and Chad are solid. He wont let this drive a wedge between you. He's probably just uncomfortable." She said.

I let her comfort me, Jessie was very wise and always seemed to know what to say to make things better. It was hard to remember the time when I had hated her, she was a completely new person.

We talked for a little bit longer before saying good night.

The next morning I met Jessie at our usual time and we drove up to the studio together.

We were shocked to say at the least when we got there and the parking lot was full of pap vans and trucks. It wasn't uncommon for a few to be here every now and again to get new pics of the stars that worked here. But today there must have been over 20 different magazine and television stations in this parking lot.

Jessie managed to park without hitting anyone or anything. However, when we got out of the car we were swarmed with paparazzi.

I held on to Jessie's hand in order to not get separated as cameras flashed and people yelled questions at us from every direction. I heard my name called out a few times but couldn't make out anything else that was being said to us.

We eventually managed to get into the building and went to our dressing room. "Wonder what was going on out there." I said

"Yeah I know, that was ridiculous!"

I nodded my head, it was ridiculous, I had never seen so many paparazzi before in my life.

We made our way to the prop house to meet up with the rest of our cast mates. Inside we found not only our cast mates but Marshal and Chad.

Everyone looked at me when we walked in. But their faces all held a look of regret and sadness.

"What's going on?" I asked

No one said anything.

"What's going on?" I asked again a bit hysterical this time. Something was wrong. Something was really wrong, I could tell.

"Chad?" I asked. Really freaking out now.

"Sonny" He said my name with sorrow as if he was apologising for something.

"What is happening?" I asked, determination in my voice. I would not be kept in the dark.

Someone pushed a magazine towards me, I say someone because once I saw the headline I didn't care about anything anymore.

_**Sonny Monroe cutting? **_It said.

_**Could it be that Sonny Monroe, actress on hit teen show So Random! Has been cutting?**_

_**An anonymous source approached pop with information about the would seem always happy, Sonny Monroe. **_

_**The source claimed that "Sonny has been self harming on her wrists for quite some time. This would be the reason why you will never see Sonny without a long sleeved shirt and bracelets on now." It is well known that Monroe has bee staying with could be ex-boyfriend for the last few months. However apparently when Monroe came clean to Cooper about her cutting problems he "immediately dumper her because he could not date someone who did that." This could be the explanation for why they have not been seen together for the last week. The source also said that Monroe has been removed from her position on So Random! Because of this resulting in why she was not performing Friday. **_

_**Monroe has yet to comment on the situation and if the reports are true, however, if you look above, it shows pictures of Monroe over the last few weeks and as told, there is not a single picture in which the stars wrists are visible. **_

_**Could Sonny really be cutting herself? **_

No! Who could of done this?

"Were not sure, Sonny. We were hoping you could tell us." Marshal said.

Did I say that out loud?

"Sonny, are you okay?" Chad said. But I couldn't answer him the room was spinning and the air felt to heavy to breath.

"Shh, Sonny, its okay. You need to calm down!" Chad told me his voice practically dripping with worry

.

Calm? He wanted me to be calm? He thought this was okay?

"You think this is okay?" I scream my emotions long past hysterical at this point. "This has been published, Chad! Everyone knows what I have been doing." My inner most darkest secret had just been shown to the world.

There was noting I could do to hide this. I hadn't been cutting lately, but my wrists still had unhealed scratches from the last time I had and I had plenty of scars on my wrist from over the years.

In order to prove I had not been cutting I would have to show my wrists and they would see everything. I was literally covered in guilt.

"What do we do?" Jessie asked.

No one spoke and I knew no one had a plan. All of our eyes turned to Marshall.

He sighed. "Sonny, you're going to have to release a statement. I don't know what you want to say or how your going to keep this a secret if you deicide to lie, but you're going to have to say something. Unfortunately this story has boomed, everyone wants answers."

I knew he was right. I couldn't just sit around and expect the paparazzi to leave me alone. They would press until I talked. I would have to figure out what to say.

"Do you mind if I take the day off, Marshall?" I asked hoping he would let me.

He nodded, "I think after all of this you deserve a personal day or two." He said

I thanked him. "Chad, Jessie, can you come with me?"

I needed Chad and Jessie right now, they were the two who had helped me out through everything and I knew they would want to help me with this. I could see it in their eyes.

"Oh and, Sonny." Marshall called as we were walking out of the room.

"yes?"

"I want you to know that this will not affect your position on so random. You wont be able to perform with cuts on your wrist, however we will not be removing you from the cast."

At least there was one good thing. I would not lose my job. But, not even that could cheer me up for long. That article could change everything, the world knew my secrets now and depending on what I chose to tell them, they could know even more soon.

Jessie and Chad didn't hesitate in coming with me (Chad not even bothering to tell anyone that he was leaving.)

The three of us stood at the end of the hall near the exit. Chad stood behind me with his arms wrapped around me and his chin lightly sitting atop of my head. Jessie stood beside me. We all stared forward.

"There is no way were going to make it to my car without getting trampled." Jessie noted as we saw more and more reporters file into the parking the where Jessie's car sat.

I inwardly groaned, I didn't want to have to deal with this yet I wanted to go to the safety of my home and sit with my mom, Jessie and Chad and talk about what we should do. There was no way we were going to make it to her car right now, we all knew that, yet none of us wanted to say it.

"Oh," Chad said. Jessie and I turned to face him a small spark of hope fluttered inside of me. "Sonny, you and I can take my car as its only a two seater and Jessie can take her car and we'll all meet up at the apartment."

"Perfect!" Jessie yelled.

"We will see you in a few." Chad said to her.

Chad and I started to walk towards the Mac Falls parking lot. "Be safe!" I yelled over my shoulder to Jessie.

"You to." she said before opening the door and disappearing into the sea of shouting paparazzi and blinding flashes of cameras.

Chad's plan was flawless, he and I made it to his car with only a few pap in our way. He held me tightly to his side as cameras and questions were thrown in our face, yet the 10 or so paparazzi here was nothing compared to the overwhelming amount that Jessie would've had to walk through.

We made the short drive to the apparent, beating Jessie surprisingly. Chad and I walked up to my room and waiter for her to show up.

Five minutes passed and turned into 30, which turned into hours. My mother came home and there was still no sign of Jessie. We checked her apartment but the door was locked and there was no answer, all of us tried texting her but there was no reply.

By the time the sun set I was really starting to freak out. Had Jessie gotten hurt trying to leave the studio? I panicked. But I knew she couldn't of, someone would have called the studio and we would have been informed if she was badly hurt. She had no where to go … so where was she.

Jessie had simply disappeared. Leaving no trace of where she was going or what she was doing.

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><p><strong>AHHHHH! D: <strong>

**Review and ask your questions (I will answer them if they don't give away too much information) You also get a 'spoiler' meaning the beginning of the next chapter so REVIEW! You will be happy you did and so will I! :)**

**Monica XOXO**


	17. Its Out

**Hey OMG it has been WAY to long since I have update and I am so sorry for that! School and other things have been catching up with me and I have like NO time to write anymore. **

**This Chapter was supposed to be longer, but I figured you guys would want it now ... so that means that the next chapter will be longer! :) **

**Anyways, some people have asked about my twitter and the name has been changed to FightEDs so sorry if you looked for the old one and couldnt find it. **

**Hope you like the new chapter! ENJOY :D**

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><p><strong>Sonnys POV<strong>

Jessie had not come back, I had no idea where she was or what to do about it.

From what I knew, she had no family she could have gone to, or any other house. She had just disappeared and I wasn't handling it well.

I had convinced my mother to let Chad stay the night. He was worried, but it was more because of my behaviour than my mothers presence.

I had changed into sweats and a tank and lied down on the couch in case anyone were to knock at the door or call.

I was curled under a blanket with my head resting on Chad's lap. My mom sat in one of the red chairs to the side of the couch, her socked feet propped up on the coffee table.

"Sonny, I don't think she is going to come tonight." My mom whispered.

"Where could she have gone, mom?" I snapped. "She has no family, no friends in the area other than our cast and all of them said they haven't seen her since she left." I told her for what felt like the hundredth time though it probably was only the third or fourth.

"I wouldn't worry to much, sunshine. Nothing bad happened because we would have been informed, you will probably see her tomorrow." Chad told me in a soothing voice.

He was rubbing my back in slow circles and whether or not he knew it, he was keeping me calm. Chad was the only reason I wasn't running out of the apartment to go find the girl I considered my sister and best friend. Well that and the reporters that my mother said were gathered outside of the building.

My mind must have been working slow because it was only then that Chad's words made sense in my mind. "Work", he had said. We were working tomorrow.

That made me feel better. Not perfect or even relieved, but it calmed me enough to finally get to bed.

I pulled Chad into my room and we lied down on the bed together. We talked for a bit about anything but Jessie and the reporters, how my life was in a downward spiral for all I knew.

Chad ended up falling asleep within an hour, but I couldn't seem to let sleep come over me tonight. Not even with the presence of Chad next to me (Which I had been desperately craving since I moved back with my mom.) My mind was sprinting and showed no signs of slowing. I had no idea what I was going to tell the paparazzi who were going to hound me on the story, not to mention that we had no idea who had released the story. They could potentially release another one of my secrets or start more rumours if I didn't stop them soon.

I felt myself begin to cry as my thoughts got worse. I could potentially lose my job if I cant stop cutting. I have already been banned from shows, how long will it take before they lose patience with me and I am replaced. I don't see why they are keeping me around right now as it is, I'm not good for anything. My biggest problem on top of my mountain of problems though, was where my friend had gone. I needed Jessie right now, I was at the most difficult point in my fight and this is when she disappeared. Jessie wouldn't abandon me, she isn't that type of person. She's the kind of person to see someone struggling and immediately rush to their aid.

_Where is she now? _The voice in my head asked me

"I don't know." I told it.

By that point, my tears had turned into sobs and I used my pillow to try and muffle their sound as to not wake up Chad. However I became more hysterical as I was left alone longer with my thoughts and not five minutes later, Chad was woken up.

"Shhhh, Sonny. Calm down, Hun." He whispered to me as he began to rub circles on my back like he had earlier.

It took a long time, but I eventually fell asleep when my body finally gave into exhaustion.

…

I was beyond tired the next morning, but I was determined to find Jessie. So, I was dragging a very tired Chad next to me out the door over an hour before we normally left.

We got down the elevator and it was then that we noticed the flood of reporters in the parking lot.

"Oh my gosh!" I cried, overwhelmed by their numbers. There was no way we would be getting to either of our cars. "What do we do?" I whispered to Chad.

"We'll have to push our way through." He said tucking me under his arm and giving me his sunglasses so I could cover my eyes.

"Ready?"

I nodded.

We opened the door and the flashes were instantaneous. Reporters moved closer to us as we tried to get to the car.

Questions were fired at us from all angles, most of them were hard to make out as everyone was yelling at the same time, but I managed to catch a few.

"Sonny, are you cutting?"

"Chad, are you two still together?"

"Are you self-harming, Sonny?"

"Was Chad at your house through the night?"

We didn't answer them, still trying to get to the car.

Eventually, Chad and I made it to his car (which was closer than mine) and he helped me get into the passenger seat. He made his around to the drivers side fairly quickly and started the car.

I ran my hands through my hair. "How are we going to get out of here?" I asked freaking out as the reporters swarmed the car refusing to move even as Chad honked the horn.

Chad didn't respond, concentrating to hard on not hitting anyone I presumed.

It took almost 10 minutes to get out of the parking lot.

When we got to the studio, we all but ran into the building in order to avoid the reporters who were sure to follow us here.

I ran - tugging Chad behind me - to our dressing room and flung open the door.

I started crying when I saw the sight before me.

All of Jessie stuff was missing, not missing, gone. Where her clothing used to be was now a pile of naked hangers. All of her make up, her costumes, shoes … everything. Gone.

Chad was just as speechless as I was.

I closed the door and made my way to the prop house.

The rest of the day I spent as a robot. I wouldn't answer questions I wouldn't eat. I couldn't function. The sight of the empty dressing room haunted me. It was like I had seen a ghost, except in this case, it was what I didn't see that was scaring me.

No one knew where Jessie had gone, not even marshal.

"Haven't heard anything from her, Sonny." He had said before taking a call from his mother.

The next few days went the same. I was a zombie, and loosing more of myself as the days went by.

By the 4th day I wouldn't even let Chad in. I didn't want Chad, I wanted Jessie.

I sat on my bed that night starring at my phone screen. Jessie's name was on the top and 58 messages had been sent to her. Not one of them had been marked as read.

I starred at the screen with watery eyes as I saw my messages change from worried, to frantic and settle on hopeless.

I sent her another message then, I expected no reply from her. She obviously didn't want to be found, and found she would not be.

_I miss you, Jessie. Please come back. _Was what I typed. My finger hovered over the send button for a second, before I sighed and sent it.

I closed my eyes and began to cry. Why was she gone, had it been me that drove her away? All the chaos? She had always been my rock. Had all of my problems piled up onto of her and buried her to a point where she to couldn't breath?

This was all my fault. I knew it was.

_Bzzz Bzzz_ My phone vibrated from its spot beside me.

I sat there for a second disbelief clouding my thoughts before I mentally slapped myself and lunged at my phone.

My face fell when I saw Chad's name at the top.

I screamed in frustration and hurled my phone at the wall of my bedroom not caring what happened to it at this point.

My anger clouded my thoughts that night and I didn't cry myself to sleep.

…

It was Monday of the next week that all of the So Random cast sat in the prop house. Chad was there too.

Today was the day we were going to post a statement regarding my cutting. It had been over a week sinc ethe story had first come out and the press had only been growing. At first it had only been Chad and I that were being followed, however now almost every member of So Random was being followed by paparazzi trying to get some information on the Sonny Cutting Herself story.

Marshall had called us Friday night after the show saying that Monday we would need to release something in order to calm down the media a little.

"I really don't know if I can do this, guys." I said.

Nico grabbed my shoulder supportively and Chad squeezed my hand which was currently in his.

I had opted to do it over the interent rather than calling into a radio station or answering questions as I didn't want to have to respond to questions. Also, I was getting Zora to try for me so all I had to do was talk.

"Its going to be hard, Sonny." Marshall said. "But its for the best."

I knew it was. The situation had started to reflect negatively on the studio and rumours had started that I was the reason why Jessie had quit the cast … if that was what she had done.

We were all still clueless as to where she was. No one had heard anything.

I was handling it better than I had the first week, and by that I mean I was getting better at hiding how bad I was really handling the situation. After the first week, I managed to pull myself together and start functioning again for the sake of everyone else around me. But it was far from the truth. I was not handling thins well. They really hadn't gotten any better; I was still drowning in worry for my friend and I had no one I could talk to about it.

I missed her so much.

"Earth to, Sonny?" A voice said as the persons hand waved in front of my face.

"Sorry, I was thinking. What did you say?"

Nico opened his mouth to speak but Zora beat him to things."

"We want to know what you want us to write." She said.

"Just say the rumours are true and that I have been dealing with self harm, but I am getting help and that I would appreciate privacy right now … something like that" I said not really wanting any of that to be shared with the world, yet knowing it would have to happen eventually.

Zoras fingers flew over the keys for a few minutes before she finally looked up.

"How does this sound?"

_**The rumours of Sonny Monroe cutting herself are in fact true. **_

_**Sonny has been receiving proper help for this problem and is doing well. Her position here on So Random will not be affected by this. She is still coming to work daily and contributing ideas to the show, however Sonny is being given personal time at the moment so she will not be in the next few performances. The whole cast here at So Random are fully supportive of Sonny and her decisions. Friends and family are requesting privacy in this time and would like to thank everyone who will stand by their side during this difficult time. **_

_**The So Random Cast. **_

I nodded and buried my face into Chad's chest. I didn't want them to see me cry.

I heard Zora press the send button and all of us sat in silence for what like forever.

"Well, kids, you guys deserve some time to yourselves. Take the rest of the morning off, we'll meet up again after lunch to start writing this weeks scripts." Marshall told us.

Everyone went their own ways, leaving Chad and I alone in the Prop House.

"Its out" I muttered, it not really feeling real yet.

I felt the bob of Chad's head in response. I looked up at his face to see that he had been watching me.

"How are you feeling?" He asked.

"I'm okay." I lied. I think he saw through me though because he pulled my face close to his and place gentile kisses up the side of my jaw before place a quick one on my lips.

"Were all here for you, Sunshine. you're not in this alone."

I knew he meant that as a comforting statement, but I couldn't help but think "not everyone is here" one person was missing and I felt incomplete because of it.

Chad and I ended up spending all morning in the prop house before going to lunch.

The cafeteria literally went silent and all eyes turned to me as Chad and I walked in. Chad squeezed my hand and we walked fully into the room.

After a moment everyone went back to their own things, but I could hear the whispers.

"… an emo Bitch"

"I bet she's just doing it for attention that's what…"

"…Like Chad shouldn't be with someone so messed up"

I shrank into Chad's side as more nasty comments were whispered. I could see Chad clenching his jaw meaning that he could hear them to.

We walked up to the cafeteria lady and she handed Chad his silver tray as usual, but turned around before giving me mine.

I was confused as to why I wasn't being given food. "Umm… excuse me, can I have my food please to, Brenda?" I asked her politely.

She turned quickly and her expression made me step backwards.

"YOU?" She yelled. "Why would we give you food? There are starving kids in Africa and you probably puke it all up when you're finished, don't you?"

Her words slapped me in the face and I stood there speechless with my mouth open.

"How dare you?" Chad yelled. He opened his mouth to speak again but decided against it and dropped his try on the counter before dragging me out of the caf.

I knew for a fact that everyone had seen that. More rumors to spread about Sonny Monroe. WONDERFUL! I thought.

We had just made it into the hall when my body caught up with my brain and the tears formed in me eyes.

Chad noticed immediately and pulled me into his chest. "I am so sorry, Sonny. She was way out of line."

I nodded but didn't really believe it. This is how I would be treated from now on, and there was nothing I could do to change it.

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><p><strong>Review your questions to have them answered AND get a preview of the next chapter! <strong>

**Monica :)**


	18. Sandwiches

**Helloooo everyone, I would like to thank you for being so patient with me as I have been super busy! I am currently on an exchange right now so its hard to find time to write. **

**I think you will all enjoy this chapter though and I wont make you wait to long for the next one :) **

**We are coming close to the end of this story and I am so grateful for all your support **

**There is a bit of action in this chapter between Chad and Sonny so if you aren't comfortable just skip over those parts. **

**So I will not hold you up and longer, Enjoy**

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><p>Three weeks. That's how long it had been since I lost my best friend. In the time that has gone by I had started to move on slightly.<p>

My cuts on my arms had healed and as I had been clean for a month I was now allowed to act again on So Random! Chad had taken an almost permanent position in my house and I in his. My mother had started to accept our relationship and we spent almost every night together because of this. Having Chad and my mother on my side was making things easier, however I was still deeply troubled, I was in no way healed, but I was doing better, and I was glad of that.

Nothing had bad had happened to me in the three weeks, for that I was relieved. The person who had posted the article about me had been laying low. The paparazzi had died down, no longer hounding me, my boyfriend or my friends which was nice, but I knew that people must still be posting stuff about me. Chad had done a good job of keeping me away from magazines or gossip sites saying that "what they are saying doesn't matter, they don't know anything on the situation and just want to feel good about themselves." I had listened to him, but we all could still hear the talk about Sonny Monroe and how messed up she is.

Today it was Thursday and tomorrow would be the day I returned to shows for the first time since I had been removed due to my cutting. I had the lead role in three out of the six sketches that we were doing, and for once no one complained about me having so many roles. They actually insisted I be the star of the show this week.

"And scene! Great job guys" Marshall called signalling the end of our dress rehearsal. "Break for lunch, afterwards we'll finish the final details. You should be home by 4:00 today. And great job to our star, good to have you back on set, Sonny."

"Thanks Marshall, good to be back!" I said, completely honest.

Everyone went their own ways for lunch and I didn't waste a second running off to the Mac Falls set to see my boyfriend.

I walked into the set to see that they were still filming, usually, the Falls would finish filming before us, but as chad took so much time off to help me, they were working a few extra hours to catch up on lost time.

I took a set in Chads chair and watched to the end of their filming. I couldn't help but admire my boyfriend as he worked. How his short blond spiky hair framed his face. His lips, how much I loved those lips on mine, or anywhere on me. A warm love consumed my body as I let my eyes run the length of Chad's body. My boyfriend was sexy, I was so lucky to have him, not only for his looks, but for everything. Chad was always there for me through everything.

"Hey, Sonshine!" Chad said coming over to me. "Wanna grab some lunch?"

I nodded.

"Where do you want to go today?" He asked me as I stood up from the chair.

"Let's just go to my house today, my mom will probably be out so we can make whatever we want."

He took my hand and together we made our way to the car.

The drive to my house was short and we were arrived within a few minutes.

"What's for lunch?" Chad asked as he opened the fridge.

I shrugged and took a seat on the counter.

"Sandwiches?"

"Sure" I agreed as Chad took out what we would need and set them next to me.

I grabbed the bread from the breadbox behind me and set it next to me with the growing pile of food. Chad grabbed the last of the lunch meat and set it next to me. He moved to start assembling the sandwiches, but before He could I grabbed him by the collar and pulled him up against me.

"I love you" I whispered as I smashed my lips against his.

"I love you, too" he said back between kisses.

I felt his hands run under my shirt and stroke my sides. I moaned into his mouth as I felt his tongue enter my mouth. I took fistfuls of hair and used it to pull him closer to me.

Chad pulled his hands out from my shirt and before I could protest he started running them over my boobs and collar bones.

My phone vibrated from my back pocket signalling that I had gotten a text and Chad pulled his mouth away from mine with a huge smile on his face.

"Love you, Sonny" he said as he placed a final kiss on my check.

I checked my phone and I had one missed message from Tawni.

"You're late, where are you?"

"Shit!" I yelled jumping off the counter. "We have to go!"

"We haven't eaten anything yet though!"

"Take something to go, we have to get back to the studio!" I yelled pointing out the time.

Chad swore when he noticed what time it was. We had been so caught up in each other that we were now over 20 minutes late for work.

"Grab something we can eat on the way back" I told him as I hastily threw everything he had taken out back into the fridge.

My phone vibrated again from on the counter. I went over and checked it.

"Where are you!? Is everything okay?" It read from Zora.

I put it down again not having time to reply.

Not two second later it vibrated again.

I picked it up.

"Maybe you should text them back and tell them you're on your way, Sonny." Chad told me.

"Sonny?" He called after a few seconds as I had not answered.

He came over to me. "Sonny? Talk to me babe! I'm worried."

I turned the phone to show him the text.

Nothing is going to stop.

-unknown.

"What's the number?" Chad asked me.

"It was blocked." I told him.

"What do you think it means?" I asked him.

The text made me worry, things had been going better the last few weeks, I didn't want that to change. My mysterious blackmailer was texting me now.

"I don't know Sonny, but we need to get back to the studio." He told me takin my hand and trying to pull me out the door, but I wouldn't budge.

Tears started to form in my eyes and my breath came out in gasps. "Chad" I cried, his name barley coming out of my mouth as I was so hysterical.

"Shh, Sonny, it will be okay you know I would never let anything happen to you." He pulled up against his chest and I cried there.

My phone buzzed again o the counter.

"We need to get back to the studio, babe. We can tell Marshall what's happened, he'll know what to do."

I let him pull me out the door. I couldn't see through my tears and I was still gasping for breath.

In the short time it took to get back to the studio I managed to calm down a bit. I was still crying, but I was able to function a little better.

Hand in hand, Chad and I walked into the prop house "Sonny!" Everyone called as I walked into the prop house. "She's been crying" Niko pointed out.

"Did you see?" Grady asked me.

"See what? The text?" I asked wondering if they had gotten a text from the unknown number.

"What text? We were talking about the article." Nico told me. "Another was was posted about 30 minutes ago. Marshall was sent an email with the link."

There was another article? The person was back. "What did it say this time?" I whispered not really wanting to know the answer but knowing I had to be told.

"It said that you were faking the cutting all along for attention."

"What?" Chad yelled looking at me. "Is that true?"

Everyone turned to look at me. They actually believe that I was faking cutting to get press attention. I was beyond furious.

"You believe that?" I yelled at them hurt that they would believe the rumours that some anonymous person had started about me, but not me when I told them it wasn't true.

"Well, whoever has been posting these has been right so far. How do we know that they aren't right now?" Zora asked.

"Because I'm telling you it's not true" I screamed at them.

"Sonny..." Tawni started to say but I didn't want to listen to what they were telling me.

I ran out of the prop house with tears of anger running down my face.

I passed my dressing room not wanting to go in there because I knew that would be the first place my cast mates would look for me.

I went down to the Mac falls set and let myself into Chads dressing room. Collapsing onto his couch and letting the hurt finally consume my body.

"I hate myself." I whispered out loud to no one in particular.

I don't know how long I laid there, but I was woken up by my boyfriend fanatically shaking my shoulder.

"Babe, wake up please." I head his voice in my groggy state.

"Huh?"

"Oh thank god!" Chad sighed. "Are you okay?"

I nodded.

"I was so worried, we didn't mean to hurt your feelings, babe. We believe you." He told me, his hands smoothing my hair behind my ears. "We were so worried, no one knew where you went and ... I'm so sorry! I love you, Sonny!"

I stopped chads rant with a quick kiss on his lips. "I love you too."

There was a tense silence that was between us for a few minutes before I finally gathered the courage to ask the question that was burning in my mind "what are we gunna do about the article? Like, we can deny the statements, but that's not gunna change anyone's mind about the situation now." It was true, from experience in other situations in the media, now that this idea that I had been cutting for attention was out there, there would always be people that would believe it now.

"Well get through it together like we always do, love." Chad told me stroking my cheek lovingly.

"Chad"

"Yes?"

"I miss her. And I'm worried. What if something happened to her? How can we be sure that noting bad has happened?" I asked him not being able to say her name out loud in fear that I would start crying again.

Chad pulled me into his arms holding me close to him. I loved chads hugs, they were the only things now a days that could make me feel a little less empty. The void that my friend left when she disappeared was not one the anyone else could manage to fill, only Chad could make things a little more bearable. He was the reason I could stay strong.

"I don't know, Sonny." He told me honestly.

I pulled him closer to me and made him lie down next to me on the couch.

Chad texted my cast mates telling then that I had been found and that I was safe.

I went back to the So Random! Set without much enthusiasm to finish my day as it was the last one I would have before returning on my first show.

I was reassured by Marshall and my cast mates that though the press that had been put on me right now was negative, it would not affect me performing in tomorrow's show. I was glad that this wouldn't stop me from doing what I love again. That was the last thing I wanted.

I finished work for the day a little later than usual and met Chad on his set.

Chad and I were walking hand in hand out of the studio when I decided I didn't want to go home tonight "do you mind if I stay the night at your house?" I asked.

Chad smile and wrapped his arm around my shoulders.

"Of course you can."

Later that night I found myself next to Chad in his bed.

"I love you" I told him.

"I love you, too, Sonny."

I pushed myself up and climbed to straddle Chads hips. I ran my hands up chads stomach and let my lips linger on his for a few seconds. Chad responded to my kiss and ran his tongue along my bottom lip wanting to make the kiss deeper. I easily accepted and opened my mouth to let him kiss me back.

I moved my hands farther up and tangled my fingers in his hair. He put his hands on my hips and I moaned into his mouth.

I pulled away gasping for breath a few seconds later.

"I love you, Sonny. You are so beautiful." Chad whispered in my ear.

I curled into my boyfriends side and closed my eyes letting sleep consume my body.

The next day I spent all morning preparing for the show determined to make this the best show I had ever done.

"Ready everyone?" Marshall asked us.

A chorus of cheers and yells followed and we all went to our respected positions.

The theme dog started to play "are you ready to get so random?" The voice yelled and I heard the screams from the audience.

"This is it. You can do this, Sonny." I told myself.

I put on my best smile and made my way out onto the stage.

...

An hour latter I came off the stage pumped with my cast mates and we all had matching smiles on our faces.

I had missed being on stage, my life wasn't complete without it.

"Awesome job guys!" Marshall came over pulling us into a group hug.

Everyone cheered back and we all went side stage to celebrate with some cookies.

"Nice work out there Sonny!" Marshall congratulated me. "The show isn't the same without you."

I smiled "thanks Marshall, I missed being on stage." I admitted.

"I know you did kid, welcome back." He said before going to talk with some other people on set.

I felt hands cover my eyes after that and drag me back.

I smiled at Chads cheesy gesture.

We walked or quite some time with his hands over my eyes. "Where are we going Chad?" I asked but got no answer.

"Chad?" I asked again after a few seconds.

Still no answer.

"What's going on?" I heard a door close and he took his hands off my eyes. The room was dark and I couldn't see anything.

"I don't understand." I said.

The lights flicked on after a second and I squinted from the sudden brightness.

I gasped at the sight in front of me.

There in front of me stood Jessie smiling.

"Jessie?" I gasped not completely believing it.

"Hey Sonny." She said.

* * *

><p><strong>Ahhhh Jessie is back! <strong>

**Questions can now be answered ;) **

**Hope you are excited for the next chapter! **

**Reviewers get a spoiler! SO REVIEW!**

**Love you all, Monica **


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